“Believe me, I don’t want to think about my cousin being all hot and bothered—”

“Oh my God! Stop!” Although I’ll be honest: I keep thinking about that kiss as well. And it does leave me with some feelings of the warm and tingly variety.

There’s a knock on my door, and Paula cracks it open. “Everything okay in here? I heard a scream.”

I put my hand over my phone. “Sorry. I’m talking to Marian.”

Paula looks blankly back at me.

“She’s my best friend from home.”

No recognition.

“Her uncle’s the sheriff.”

Nada.

“You picked me up from their house. She’s coming here for winter break.”

Did she take a pill to completely wipe her mind clear of her time in Wisconsin? Seriously.

“Um, she has my dog.”

There it is. Paula winces at the mention of Baxter. “Oh, that’s nice. Let me know if you need anything.”

“I will.” She gives me one more glance before closing the door.

“Sorry, that was Paula checking in on me,” I say to Marian.

“Do you call her Paula or Mom?”

“I try to avoid calling her by any name.”

There’s a pause for a slight moment. “Do you think you’ll be happy there?”

I weigh the options in my head. It doesn’t take long since I don’t have many of them. I’m stuck here, so I either have to suck it up and get used to it … or I guess I could just have a horrible attitude and make everybody’s lives, including mine, miserable.

“I’m going to try.”

“Oh God, Ally, I can smell the bullshit from here.”

This is the thing about Marian. She can sense the lie on me even when we’re on the phone.

“I don’t know what to do,” I confess.

“I can’t even imagine what you’re thinking. And my parents told me that I’m supposed to be positive and everything and that you have this family that has missed you, but it’s not fair. And I’m so pissed. I’m pissed that you’ve been taken away from us. I know I should be only thinking about you, and I am, it’s just this sucks.”

“It does!” It’s nice to say it aloud and stop burying it inside.

“I wonder if I can kidnap you when I visit. Or is a kidnapping reference too soon?”

“It’s not.” I know my father did this horrible thing, but I still don’t understand: how can someone kidnap their own child? I’m pretty sure if Paula and Dad would’ve gotten a proper divorce and I had to go to court and choose between them when I was little, I would’ve chosen Dad. So what’s the difference?