Chapters (84)
She’s leaner than she’d been a year ago, at least from what I saw in photos. Tougher, too, given the suspicious look she threw in my direction when she first saw me, before she recognized me. Ah, those eyes. There is no denying they are mine, dark and fathomless. I try to read her, but I can’t.
This is normally what I’m very good at.
Observing people, seeing what’s beneath their surfaces, what they keep buried. But Bonnie remains a mystery. Some people say that you can never know your children, which might be true.
There is so much I want to say to this young woman, this teenager.
“Nora? What are you . . . is this about the tattoo?” Bonnie says, to cover her shock.
“What tattoo?”
She doesn’t answer for a moment. Then, her voice low with urgency, she tells me about the tattoo she remembers from the time she was kidnapped over a year ago. “I can’t get it out of my head. I draw it all the time. It makes me feel like I did back then, when they took me. Like someone’s always watching,” she says.
“Have you told your parents about this?”
She shakes her head. “No. It’s just a feeling, right? I don’t want to freak my mom out.” She’s scared but doesn’t want anyone else to be.
This caution, the instinct for silence . . . I guess there must be some connection between us after all.
All my hopes of what this reunion could be fall away, and now I’m scared, too, though my fear means almost nothing. I have lived with it for far too long. It has made a home inside me, and I have come to expect it.
No, it’s her fear that is a travesty. I’ve made a powerful enemy, but it hadn’t occurred to me that he would be keeping an eye on Bonnie. But it should have.
I tell her there’s nothing to worry about, that I’ll look into the origins of this tattoo for her. Then I leave before she can ask any questions.
I stay in Toronto for two days, at a motel on the east end of the city. It’s close enough for me to keep an eye on the sleek town house that Bonnie shares with her adoptive mother, Lynn. I watch, but don’t see anything suspicious. Yet.
It means I have some time.
I can’t stay here if I’m going to look for the man who has made my daughter scared for her life, the one who was behind the attack on Nate Marlowe. She doesn’t know that he’s after me. And she sure as hell doesn’t know that I’m going to find him first.