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Back No Going Back: a Novel Save as PDF
Chapters (84)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. Part 1
  4. 1
  5. 2
  6. 3
  7. 4
  8. 5
  9. 6
  10. 7
  11. 8
  12. 9
  13. 10
  14. 11
  15. 12
  16. 13
  17. 14
  18. Part 2
  19. 15
  20. 16
  21. 17
  22. 18
  23. 19
  24. 20
  25. 21
  26. 22
  27. 23
  28. 24
  29. 25
  30. 26
  31. 27
  32. 28
  33. 29
  34. 30
  35. 31
  36. 32
  37. Part 3
  38. 33
  39. 34
  40. 35
  41. 36
  42. 37
  43. 38
  44. 39
  45. 40
  46. 41
  47. 42
  48. Part 4
  49. 43
  50. 44
  51. 45
  52. 46
  53. 47
  54. 48
  55. 49
  56. 50
  57. 51
  58. 52
  59. Part 5
  60. 53
  61. 54
  62. 55
  63. 56
  64. 57
  65. 58
  66. Part 6
  67. 59
  68. 60
  69. 61
  70. 62
  71. 63
  72. 64
  73. 65
  74. 66
  75. 67
  76. 68
  77. 69
  78. 70
  79. 71
  80. 72
  81. Acknowledgments
  82. About the Author
  83. Also by Sheena Kamal
  84. About the Publisher

I know who it is before I look up.

Dao has killed yet again in a fit of rage and returned clearheaded to see the damage he’s wrought. To see if I would come. And I have. I’m right here.

The officer has his weapon drawn, but he’s too late.

Dao shoots him. Three bullets. Forehead and two body shots. A professional job because he’s a professional.

I find my balance and stand.

“Why?” My voice doesn’t sound like my own. It’s a strangled, dying thing. I gesture to the house, to the scene just inside the door.

He stares at me. He doesn’t look like the same man I’d remembered. He’s aged a decade since the Indonesia video, stooped, obviously in pain. Wearing clothes that are far too small for him and bareheaded in this weather.

But when he speaks, it’s the voice I remember from my past. “Jin died because of you. And my son . . . he died because of you, too.”

“What are you talking about?” I look back at him, slack-jawed, with absolute, mind-numbing horror.

Because I see. I see now, what this is all about.

67

After seeing Bonnie and Lynn in the cabin, it becomes all too real. I remember with crystal clarity snow-covered mountains almost two years ago. A ritzy chalet. In the reflection of a window, an erotically charged look passes between a man and a woman.

I followed the family to the wilderness of Ucluelet on Vancouver Island; I stood outside the Zhang residence and looked up. The waves of the Pacific Ocean crashed against the rocks, the surf coming far too close to my feet, but I was too arrested by what I saw to move.

A huge mansion, set along the rugged coastline, with glassed-in walls. In one of the upstairs bedrooms, Dao and Jia Zhang. The man and the woman in the window. They are naked, pressed against each other, in the throes of an affair I found shocking, though hardly anything shocked me anymore.

The baby who had cancer, the one they’d kidnapped Bonnie for, to see if she could be a bone marrow donor. But she wasn’t. They were going to get rid of her because she wasn’t a match.

To the world, the baby was Kai Zhang’s son, but Dao treated it like it was his own. Jia’s child was his own. After she died, that sick child didn’t have a mother anymore.

He didn’t stand a chance.

It makes sense now. Dao blames me for killing his family. He was always going to hurt mine for what he thinks I’ve taken from him. His whole world. A child’s death is a black mark against humanity. Any child’s death, but especially hers.

Jia’s child.