“Every year, on the anniversary of the accident, I go cliff jumping. It started off as a way to honor my brother, but by my junior year of college, it had started to look like an escape. You see, I was about to turn twenty-one.” James runs a hand through his short hair and scratches at his beard. “I was about to be older than my brother for the first time. That”—he releases a shaky breath—“felt impossible and wrong. So, on that day, I decided to skip Black Rocks. Instead, I went to Dead River Falls. Which no longer technically exists, so that gives you an idea of how old I am.”

A few people laugh at that. I can’t. Not because I don’t know the place he’s talking about but because this isn’t funny. This is raw and horrifying. This is gut-wrenching, and I’m not sure I want to know what happens next. That he is standing in front of me, whole and safe, is the only reason I stay with his story.

“I hiked to the top in the snow. The water was still flowing from the falls, but it was icy. I knew people jumped off there, but never in winter. It wasn’t a clear jump like Black Falls. That night, it was empty. I sat there at the edge, smoking, for a long, long time. So long I was shivering and achy. My clothes were soaked through from the snow. I was exhausted of living and knew without a doubt that if I went in, as cold as it was, I wouldn’t be coming out.”

James turns and looks at Brian. “Then, I heard a voice. He said—” He pushes the mic in Brian’s face.

Brian grins, but his eyes are red rimmed. “If you jump, I jump.”

James shakes his head, lost in the moment. He turns back to us. “And I stood up and went home with Brian.”

I take a closer look at the man next to my uncle. Brian? Best friend Brian? That must be Micah’s stepdad.

James continues, “I couldn’t bear the thought of another life ended because of me. I never went back. That spring, Dead River flooded, and the falls dried up. But it didn’t matter. By that time, I was going to a weekly Bible study with this guy and falling in love with the life God meant for me.”

James straightens. “A life that includes all of you and this place. And it’s been a great one so far. The last fifteen years have been infinitely better than the previous twenty. I never knew I could need anything else. That was before Meg showed up.” He gestures to me, and I blink through my tears at him.