She continued to listen to Paige and Grandma Tate talk, smiling in all the right places and responding to questions or comments when appropriate. But the entire time, her thoughts were on her fathera ghost that had not haunted her mind in a very long time. And now that she knew her days were numbered, he seemed to suddenly be rattling his chains a little louder than he had in the past.

***

The following day, one hour before she was due to pick Paige up from school, Rachel met Jack at a coffee shop. Rachel had not yet returned to work, having called in sick with the excuse of migraines. Coming off of yet another successful closed case, no one had really batted an eye. Jack had gone back to work as usual, though, taking something of an extended lunch break to meet with her. Theyd not spoken since parting ways after returning home from Roanoke and even though there had been no arguments or cross words between them, this was a conversation Rachel was dreading.

He started the conversation bluntly enough, but not in a harsh or critical way. He sat down across from her, coffee in hand, and asked: Did you tell Paige yet?

No, not yet.

He frowned but nodded. Can I ask why? I mean, I have no children, so I cant even imagine what breaking this sort of news must be like. But I also cant see how its good to keep it in.

The easy answer is because Im a coward. The more complicated answer has to do with her being eight years old and not fully understanding the gravity of it. Its a strange age, you know?

And what about Peter? Has he been supportive?

Hes checked out. Hes threatening to leave me.

What?

She shrugged, wishing she hadnt said it. But damn it, she had to tell someone, didnt she? Hes pissedand understandably sothat I not only waited so long to tell him, but because Im not interested in getting treatment.

Like chemo? And then, as if still hung up on it, he shook his head and said, Really? Hed leave you over this?

Yes, like chemo, she said. I just cant see going through all of that sickness and weakness when there isnt even a solid guarantee that Ill come out the other side cancer-free. Based on what the doctor has told me, weve caught it late. Not late enough where theres no hope, but theres at least some.

And its more than the sickness. Theres the fact that I went to Alex Lynch for help without telling himor anyone, reallyand the trouble its caused. Its also the fact that I chose work over family right away, even in the midst of all of it and…

She trailed off, starting to feel entirely too ashamed of herself.