I prayed for the sound of the cars on the river to save me from the despair choking my lungs. Auntie Eileen and Lizzie were all solemn looks and heartfelt hugs ’til they got inside and Lizzie nearly keeled over.

–  Holy Mother of fu—! She’s still there. Just sitting there!

–  Well, the priest is on his way, I hope, and O’Carolan. Where did you think she was going to be?

–  I don’t bloody know, Mary! In a bed or something! Jesus, that’s put the heart right across me, that has, seeing her by the range. Can you not move her?

–  Where would you like her? Pegged out on the washing line?

That’s when we fell apart, laughing fit to burst!

–  Behave now, you pair, says Eileen. You’re confusing Bernie. She doesn’t even know what’s wrong!

Bernie was sitting beside Bridie, looking like she was waiting for a mug of tea. We howled some more ’til we heard the priest’s car draw up and right behind it the sound of John Johns’s tractor and O’Carolan’s hearse. Far too soon, she was laid out in her room full of blue roses. Remember, man, that thou art but dust, and unto dust thou shalt return.

The wake was packed to the rafters. I saw people that I hadn’t seen in twenty years. Why did people make a bigger effort for the dead than the living? Even my friend Scrumptious Connolly from schooldays showed up already pissed. His hair was still blond but his beautiful face was purple; what a waste, I thought, as he hugged me and a whiff of old sweat and drink soured the very air around him. I caught Lizzie looking at him with something akin to regret. The road not taken. We had made a mountain of ham sandwiches and had bought another mountain of fruitcake. John had ordered there was to be no scrimping.

He came with crates of whiskey and beer and Lizzie had come back with wine. Serena must have wept the whole way home; her face was the size of a football by the time we got her in and settled with cold teabags on her eyes.

We had a great couple of jolly days and nights. The place never emptied and the smell of cigarette and pipe smoke soaked away the nervy air. Scrumptious came both nights because there was free drink – he had no shame at all, God love him, not a shred. We drank and we talked and we laughed ’til we cried over all the old stories. Bridie getting trapped in the auld outhouse by a herd of stray cows; Bridie pretending she wasn’t lifting up her backside to fart after every meal; Bridie arguing that it was not possible to use too much lily-of-the-valley talcum powder, we were all too allergic for our own good.