The sound of the doorbell seems like a rude interruption. I walk to the door and I feel that maybe things will be right between us once again. We have our share of good times and bad times, we are no different than any other couple. My mood is light.

I open the door to see what I don’t want to see – Jerome Fagan standing on my doorstep.

I turn and walk into the kitchen and Jerome follows me. It’s been a while since I found him here in my kitchen drinking coffee with Jenny while I struggled to lead the lads to victory out on the football pitch. Jenny doesn’t seem to know what to do with herself so Jerome says that he is here to see me. How is it that I feel uncomfortable in my own house as if I am in the way, an outsider in some club, not part of some pact? Jenny mutters something about going to buy milk. I give her a look. I want to stop her in her tracks and demand to know why she is contacting Jerome behind my back but I don’t. I’ve a good mind to scream.

Des, he says.

I don’t like the way he feels he can use my name like he’s a friend or something but I don’t say it. I set the kettle to boil, and I stare at the neon blue light at its base. The kids run in to get water and their clambering at the tap dispels the tension in the room. Jerome asks them what age they are and if they like school – the usual stupid adult talk. Mikey and Joey don’t respond and Maeve smiles her quiet smile. I smile back at Maeve because it’s hard not to.

The boys go back outside as quickly as they came in but Maeve hangs back. I tell her to go back outside and to let us have a cup of tea in peace. She starts for the hall and I can tell she is reluctant because of the way she drags her feet. Jerome informs me that he wishes to be straight with me. Jenny has told him about what I did to her work, about her disappointment and how he feels he is to blame.

I don’t need another man to tell me that I have let my wife down. A man who is the cause of all this trouble in the first place.

The Italian choir is a crescendo of voices and its beauty is somehow being distorted by the presence of this man in my kitchen, noble and all as he thinks he is with his surprise visit. Here to set things straight, I cannot believe such audacity.