I sit here and I destroy the sketches of the sea. One by one. All of them. I add drama and depth to the delicate seas. I rub out great tracts of waves from the rough waters. Everything is upside down, you can tell a story any way you want. I am upside down. There are two sides to every story and this is my side. I add colour to the drawing of the Brother as he is kneeling down in a religious trance gazing out to the horizon. I draw fish – stupid fish that you learn to draw in school with three-quarters of their bodies covered in tiny waves that look like the imaginary mermaid’s tail of childhood. Its glimmering sheen. And the one big fish eye that seems ever so important. This is realism as any kid under the age of ten will tell you. I line up the empty beer bottles in straight lines much like I used to do in the Crown with Andy when things were quiet.

I check on the kids.

I check that the immersion is off.

I check that I can puke.

I am sitting on the couch at one o’clock in the morning when I hear a scuffle at the front door. Jenny. I can go out and open the door for her but I don’t. I hear her throwing her bag on the floor and as she puts one foot on the stairs I call her to me.

She looks like she’s had a grand old time and here am I sitting on the couch listening to the Smiths. I am old.

Well, how was it? I ask.

My voice is sneering and I don’t mean it to be but that’s the way it comes out. She sits down and I can see the effect of his attention on her. Her gait, her aura, all different, a bit like the way she was when she came back from the meeting with Simon Thompson from Gallery One. All hope and ambition and for a split second I sit here and I wonder how can my wife be so full of herself. I ask her if she wants a beer and she says that she’s had enough to drink and I tell her that I would like very much for her to have a beer with me, her husband. I get two beers and I hand one to her. She cradles it. I open my beer with my teeth and I throw the bottle opener to her. With a clink we are both sitting now comfortably. I ask her about Jerome. She says that he’s fine and that he wanted to catch up and hopes that his son might get to know our kids now that he is living in the area.