“She seems sweet,” my mother told me when I came home for Sunday dinner. Looking back at that night now, I realize how much slower she was to set the table. How everything was a little off, but to me, Sunday dinner was just an obligation I had to my mother before I would be leaving to go out and have a good time.

“You didn’t really talk to her,” I said and laughed at my mom, shaking my head and taking a drink from whatever was in my cup. I leaned back and looked at my father, waiting for him to agree with me. When he didn’t, I added, “Plus she’s the only girl you’ve seen me with.”

“That’s true,” Ma replied and shrugged. “I like the way you two look together,” she stated matter-of-factly and then looked me in the eyes as she smiled. “Is it too much to ask that you pretend to value your mother’s opinion?”

I let out a small laugh and shook my head. “I’m glad you approve,” I told her. More just to make her happy than anything else, but it only opened the door for Ma to invite her over for the next family dinner. I had already started coming up with reasons to end it that night.

It was too much. I was young and in my prime and working a job that would keep my appetite well-fed.

I was ready to end it too the next night; it was too serious, too soon. But her smile and the way she laughed at me when I pulled up wearing an old rugby shirt caught me off guard in a way I found completely endearing. She thought it was the oddest thing and I’ll never forget the way her soft voice hummed with laughter and it carried into the night. Who was I to take that away? I knew she’d end it with me anyway. I didn’t know it would be after marriage and six years later.

If I could go back to that night, I would change it all and I’d make sure I told Ma she was right.

“I’m heading to bed.” My father’s voice catches me by surprise and my body jolts from the memory. I pretend to rub the sleep from my burning eyes and clear my throat to tell my father good night. It’s tight with emotion and it takes me a second to sit up in bed.

“You look like hell,” Pops says.

Nodding in agreement, I take a moment to set my feet on the floor. My head is still hung low and my shoulders are sagging as I rest my elbows on my knees.