Bella’s words in the woods. Her confession. The roar of the wind and rain sweeping through the trees. Bella’s voice as I stood there shaking, the roar of the wind sweeping through me, the roar and the rage. It swept through me and I pushed her, all the strength of the storm in my arms as I shoved…

As the whole awful memory stands before me, the words of the fairy tale come back. The final lines I’ve been hiding from for ten years: As the girl stood there alone, she realized she was the monster and not a little girl at all…

I thought Lena was the monster. And Max. And Greg Lewis. I thought they were the monsters Bella sent me to find.

But the monster is me. It’s always been me.

Dad is still downstairs, sitting in the dark kitchen, staring at nothing. I sit opposite him and take his hands.

“I remember,” I whisper.

He squeezes my hands. “Tess…don’t.”

“It was me, Dad. I did it. I was angry—we were arguing and I…pushed her and she fell. It was me. I killed Bella.”

It’s what I said to Dad at the hospital after Bella died. Not so coherent, confused enough that he could make himself dismiss it as nonsense muttered by a daughter with a head injury, a daughter drifting on morphine.

I did it but I never meant to…

Those words could have meant anything, couldn’t they? Muttered by sixteen-year-old me, lying in a hospital bed. It was nothing, that’s what Dad told himself because he couldn’t stand to think anything else.

“I’ll have to tell the police,” I say, tears pouring hot down my cheeks.

“No,” Dad says softly.

“Dad—I have to. Didn’t you hear me? It was me. I…”

“It was an accident. An accident. Just like they said it was. You didn’t mean to do it, did you?”

I shake my head.

“Tess…God, Tess.” Dad’s crying as well and I can’t bear it. Can’t bear what I’ve done to him. “I can’t lose you as well. I can’t. You’re all I have left. Please don’t leave me on my own. Please.”

I lay my head down and cry, painful sobs pulled from my chest, crying so hard it hurts. Dad cradles my head in his hands and strokes my hair and says it over and over. Please. Please don’t. Don’t leave me on my own.

I don’t know what to do.

I close my eyes and Bella is there, next to Dad, her eyes bright with tears.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“I know. It’s okay, Tess,” she says. “You needed to remember but you can sleep now.”

Forgive me, my mind whispers.

Always, baby sis. Bella’s voice is fainter now. Now sleep…