Back The Taming of the Tights Save as PDF
Contents ( 33)
  1. Dedication
  2. Contents
  3. Filling my tights again
  4. Lullah’s Lululuuuve List
  5. Return of the lunatic twins
  6. Snogs ahoy!
  7. The Blubberhouses Large Ladies Who Pole Dance for Fun Society
  8. Boy Ambush
  9. You don’t want to do any more winking back
  10. The fire escape of desire
  11. I’ve eaten snail shells
  12. Snogging and Jazzles
  13. The magic of puppetry
  14. Return of the beast in trousers
  15. See you there, cheeky miss
  16. My inner snogger
  17. Naughty bumberskite
  18. The church bells of doom
  19. Should I put nail varnish on my hoofs?
  20. The Dark Black Crow of Heckmondwhite
  21. He’s got the right amount of lip
  22. Praise the knees!
  23. Fir-cone earrings and knitted onesies
  24. The Taming of the Tights
  25. The Corker-Holding with Winter Socks scene
  26. Georgia’s Ace Gang Snogging Scale
  27. Tallulah’s glossary
  28. Back Ads
  29. About the Author
  30. Books by Louise Rennison
  31. Credits
  32. Copyright
  33. About the Publisher

I said, “No, not at all, I was just . . . er . . . getting my coat.”

Lav ruffled my hair again. Why does she do that? It’s like she’s patting a big dog. She said, “Ah, you’re ‘getting your coat,’ are you? To be sure, to be sure. Are you keeping it in the music studios, me dahling?”

And she went off tinkling with laughter with Dav and Noos.

Bob came clanking through the swing doors from the studio shouting, “OK, cool it, dudettes. Let them through . . . no autographs . . . the band have to make their way to a gig. So move along.”

Everyone just kept on jumping up and down and screeching. Bob adjusted his trousers, which were coming adrift with the weight of his spanners, and shouted again, “OK, listen up. You dudes know my band, The Iron Pies . . . well, breaking news . . . our next gig is at the Cattle Market in Cleckheaton! I have some flyers here, which I can sign for you, if you form an orderly queue . . .”

Jack appeared through the doors followed by Ruben and Cain, and Bob was practically flattened in the stampede. As soon as I saw Cain, that old dread feeling came over me. He was dressed all in black and immediately surrounded by girls asking him to sign their pencil cases and their arms. Cassie Perkins actually fainted and had to be taken to the sickbay by Gudrun.

I glanced back at Cain, who was looking down, signing something, and as I did, Cain looked up. Over the heads of all the adoring girls.

Straight at me.

How had he known to look up just then?

A second later and I would have been gone.

He’s like a wild animal. He seems to sense where I am.

Then, as the girls started pulling at his jacket, Ruben and Jack dragged him off through the crowd. Flossie was just by me and she said, “He looked straight at you, didn’t he? That baaaaaaaad Cain boy.”

Then Seth came through the swing doors from the studio with his guitar. Flossie said, “Well, well, well, speaking of bad boys.”

She stood still and looked at Seth. He noticed her. Then he handed his guitar to Bob and pushed his way through the girls until he was standing in front of Flossie.

I tried to back away. All of the girls went quiet.

Seth said, “I’ve got summat for thee, big lass.”

Flossie put her hands on her hips.

“Oh, what could you possibly have that I’d want?”

And he winked at her and handed her a poster. He said, “It’s got my picture on it.”

Flossie said, “Is it a ‘Wanted’ poster issued by the police?”

Seth put his face closer to hers. “It’s the poster for our gig. Why don’t tha come? I’d like to see more of thee. There’s a lot of thee to see, isn’t there?”