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Chapters (22)
  1. The Moss House
  2. Imprint
  3. Chapter One
  4. Chapter Two
  5. Chapter Three
  6. Chapter Four
  7. Chapter Five
  8. Chapter Six
  9. Chapter Seven
  10. Chapter Eight
  11. Chapter Nine
  12. Chapter Ten
  13. Chapter Eleven
  14. Chapter Twelve
  15. Chapter Thirteen
  16. Chapter Fourteen
  17. Chapter Fifteen
  18. Chapter Sixteen
  19. Chapter Seventeen
  20. Chapter Eighteen
  21. Chapter Nineteen
  22. Epilogue

We promise each other we will be more secretive in future and I swear to her I will never answer back to him again. What has my dear Elizabeth ever done to deserve this? I realise that if I stay here there will be no end to this, his coming and going. He already treats me with contempt as if I am his second wife, as if he can treat me just like her and try to control me, ignoring that I am a guest and have as much wealth and probably more status than him. He sees me just as a woman, beneath him in all ways.

If I remain here, I will be accepting of him just as Elizbeth was so innocently five years ago. Despite vowing to never marry and managing without it thus far, to live here with my sister would be as good as marrying Sutherland myself. She is trapped. I realise I should take heed of my own warning and that if John were alive, he too would say the same. My presence here may alleviate her suffering while he is away but cannot solve it and may make it worse if he resents us. My poor sister is legally bound to him forever and he can do with her as he pleases. He may have one Walker in his clutches, but he shall not have me too. I will not let him decide my fate as I am still free.

He leaves again and thankfully is gone for two months, during which time Elizabeth realises she is with child again.

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fourteen

Winter, 1833: A journey overseas and a surprise reunion

Miss Lister

I leave Mariana full of discontent. How she vexes me! Why are women so complicated? They fill me with half-truths and suggestions and never a plain answer, and I always get hurt. Mariana will not leave Charles but I cannot have an affair with her, so I am once again single and left waiting for him to die. I should orchestrate a need for him to climb up a tree during a shoot.

I had come all the way over the country, far out of my way heading to London, in the hope of either an ending and a goodbye or a reunion and a new beginning, and at least some pleasure. I had left Miss Walker behind and now want to leave Mariana, thus freeing me up for new adventures and diary pages to fill with life in London, Paris and beyond.