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Contents ( 57)
  1. Prologue
  2. One
  3. Two
  4. Three
  5. Four
  6. Five
  7. Six
  8. Seven
  9. Eight
  10. Nine
  11. Ten
  12. Eleven
  13. Twelve
  14. Thirteen
  15. Fourteen
  16. Fifteen
  17. Sixteen
  18. Seventeen
  19. Eighteen
  20. Nineteen
  21. Twenty
  22. Twenty-One
  23. Twenty-Two
  24. Twenty-Three
  25. Twenty-Four
  26. Twenty-Five
  27. Twenty-Six
  28. Twenty-Seven
  29. Twenty-Eight
  30. Twenty-Nine
  31. Thirty
  32. Thirty-One
  33. Thirty-Two
  34. Thirty-Three
  35. Thirty-Four
  36. Thirty-Five
  37. Thirty-Six
  38. Thirty-Seven
  39. Thirty-Eight
  40. Thirty-Nine
  41. Forty
  42. Forty-One
  43. Forty-Two
  44. Forty-Three
  45. Forty-Four
  46. Forty-Five
  47. Forty-Six
  48. Forty-Seven
  49. Forty-Eight
  50. Forty-Nine
  51. Fifty
  52. Fifty-One
  53. Fifty-Two
  54. Fifty-Three
  55. Acknowledgements
  56. About the Author
  57. Also by Sharon Gosling

‘You impressed him,’ Toby said. ‘In that chat you had over tea.’

‘Maybe,’ Rachel said. ‘But I think he’d have done it for anyone. He’s like that. I owe him… well, everything, really. I don’t know what I would have done without him. I have no idea where I’d be now. Sleeping rough, probably.’

Toby wondered where home had been before the van, who her family were and why she couldn’t go back to them. But all he said was, ‘That’s why you’re so tolerant of Gilly. Isn’t it?’

‘I suppose it is.’ Rachel looked thoughtful for a moment, distant, and then brought her attention back to him with a smile. ‘Anyway, that’s more than enough about me,’ she said, which wasn’t at all true because Toby had been left with even more of a feeling of mystery about her than when she’d started speaking. ‘Tell me about you. How did you end up as a journalist?’

‘I can’t remember ever wanting to be anything else, at least not seriously,’ Toby said. ‘I was going into my GCSE years at the time of the war in the Balkans. It was horrifying for many reasons, obviously, but I was also fascinated, because on screen there were kids my age on both sides of the conflict. There were teenagers cowering in the corner of basements while shells landed over their heads, and there were others in camouflage gear with guns, and there was I, spending my days struggling with math equations. I wanted to know how their lives could be so different to mine. I was also fascinated by the journalists who put themselves in harm’s way to ask the questions I wanted to ask. It was before the age of citizen journalists. It seemed – I don’t know, like a noble profession, I suppose, to show the rest of the world the stories of people who couldn’t tell it for themselves.’

He glanced at Rachel to find her watching him, listening intently, and was a little unnerved by the strength of her gaze.

‘And is it?’ she asked. ‘A noble profession?’

He finished his pint. ‘I think so. Mostly, anyway. You don’t agree?’

She looked away. ‘I think your sort probably is. Or at least sets out to be.’ She looked back at him. ‘Do you miss it?’

‘Yes,’ he said. ‘It’s the only work I’ve ever known, and it was never just a job. It was my whole life, really. But I’ll never get insurance to go out again, not with my leg the way it is, so unless I’m happy to confine myself to a desk job, or a local beat… I have no choice but to accept that it’s time to move on.’

‘I’m sorry.’

‘It’s the risk I accepted when I chose the life. Anyway, that’s why Sylvie – my ex – is badgering me so hard about this memoir. She’s convinced it’s going to lead into some great new career. I’ve a hunch she sees me as the new Michael Palin.’