Chapter 10

Devastated.

Noah texted to say that he had to cancel our lesson on Thursday. Up to the eyes in redesigning a building due to planning objections was his official line. But maybe he doesn’t want to do this? Maybe after our shopping trip he realised I was either a. a lost cause, or b. he wanted to go out on proper dates.

I spent two hours berating myself for being so pathetic and caring about a cancelled lesson, then another hour drinking wine and eating popcorn before the second longer text came in saying he was really sorry, and he’d make it up to me.

‘I’ll add in an extra free lesson! Noah’

‘But I don’t pay!! Rosie.’

‘Aha, on the ball as ever! Have to make it up to you some other way.’

He signed off with a winky face that made me disproportionality happy.

Totally out of proportion. I mean, why should I care this much either way?

Apart from the fact that I have told Mum I will be bringing a date to her party and Noah seems to be my only hope at the moment, and every time he cancels a date, he decreases the probability of me achieving my aim. So therefore, him adding a bonus lesson in has to be worth celebrating, yes? Great!

But the initial disappointment is bothering me. My heart used to plunge like that when I’d been waiting for Dad for three hours, only to be told that he’d had to cancel his flight.

I’m beginning to depend on him. Rely on him, like I relied on Dad.

This is not good.

If there is one thing I’ve always been determined to be, it’s independent. Well, at least where men are concerned.

But he’s not Dad. He did apologise, and he didn’t need to.

Oh hell, am I making a massive mistake? Would I just be better hiring an escort? One from out of town that nobody will know (can you imagine the embarrassment if I hired him sight-unseen and he turned out to be the plumber, moonlighting for some extra cash?). I mean, I really do suck at this adult relationship lark. I’m a capable woman. I have a good job, friends, a nice home – isn’t that enough?

It’s not though, is it? I liked having a boyfriend, I just did. Like some people like having a pet, I suppose. I just wish I could work out why I’m so rubbish at this and then maybe I could sort it out. Myself.

Without risking getting too involved with somebody like Noah.

Chapter 11

This seduction business is bloody hard work. I’m not sure I’ve got time for it. The past few days have passed in a bit of a whirl. It went like this:

Monday

I was woken by a deep vibration, of the mobile phone incoming text variety.

‘How’s the homework going? N x’

Noah has taken to signing off on his texts with a kiss: this happened at some point during our exchange after he’d had to cancel Thursday. This is just like me signing off to Bea with one. We’re friends now, we (or rather I) have got over the awkward ‘is this a good idea?’ phase, as I’m positive he has absolutely no interest in me at all (on a proper date front) so I am safe.