Back Shelf Life Save as PDF
Chapters (39)
  1. Cover
  2. ABOUT THE AUTHOR
  3. Dedication
  4. Epigraph
  5. Shelf Life
  6. 04/01/2016
  7. 6 EGGS
  8. SANDWICH BREAD
  9. DIET COKE
  10. TAMPONS
  11. APPLES
  12. SUGAR
  13. DEO
  14. COTTON WOOL
  15. PIZZA
  16. WHOLE CHICKEN
  17. SPAGHETTI
  18. SOUP
  19. TOMATOES
  20. TEABAGS
  21. AFTERSHAVE
  22. WHITE WINE
  23. PRAWNS
  24. OLIVES
  25. MOBILE TOP-UP
  26. STRAWBERRIES
  27. HONEY
  28. MOISTURIZER
  29. DATES
  30. FLOWERS
  31. CONDITIONER
  32. SINGLE CREAM
  33. PULSES
  34. STEAK (LEAN)
  35. BLEACH
  36. SOME KIND OF PUDDING
  37. A Girl
  38. 11:09 04/01/2017
  39. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

girl is a certified freak imho

BABY POISON says:

who’s this ruth with the eyes tho?????

BABY POISON says:

I cant believe ive missed out on a certified freak :’’’’’’’((((((((((

mrs tracey pitt says:

i mean i wouldn’t say

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

if she aint a freak then idk who is

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

genuinely gives me the creeps

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

you noticed this T dont lie

BABY POISON says:

okay 1 sec

BABY POISON says:

lets get this straight

BABY POISON says:

who ⋆is⋆ this girl

BABY POISON says:

what does she look like

BABY POISON says:

is she in the d&d club like

BABY POISON says:

does she have terrible BO?

BABY POISON says:

does she have a glass eye and a walking stick

BABY POISON says:

XD XD

mrs tracey pitt says:

she’s like

mrs tracey pitt says:

seriously non-descript lan

mrs tracey pitt says:

doesnt surprise me u dont remember

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

yeah super insignificant

BABY POISON says:

makes sense for moobs

BABY POISON says:

but how

BABY POISON says:

⋆how⋆ is she a certified freak?

BABY POISON says:

lets not jump the gun thank u v much girls

BABY POISON says:

u have to tick a few boxes to earn that status u kno? :P

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

ya

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

u kno sum people just look at you in a creepy way

mrs tracey pitt says:

ya

mrs tracey pitt says:

proper sociopath vibe

mrs tracey pitt says:

I agree

BABY POISON says:

jesus

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

freaks me out like

mrs tracey pitt says:

like she’s always thinking

mrs tracey pitt says:

or something

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

watchin u

mrs tracey pitt says:

like she knows something you don’t

mrs tracey pitt says:

or something

BABY POISON says:

eugh

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

⋆plans ur murder⋆

BABY POISON says:

XD XD XD XD

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

so moobs lets her sit out all the time

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

5 weeks in a row now

BABY POISON says:

wtffff seriously????????

mrs tracey pitt says:

that’s not like mr alpin?

BABY POISON says:

maybe shes srsly sick or something

BABY POISON says:

dont u think??

BABY POISON says:

its not like moobs lets you off if it isnt something serious

BABY POISON says:

never worked for me in the past did it

mrs tracey pitt says:

ya remember that time u asked to sit out bc u were going to the movies with alfie

BABY POISON says:

omg trace don’t even

BABY POISON says:

that was an evening of absolute disaster

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

dude

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

unfair to blame it on moobs for chambers floppy willy

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

imho

BABY POISON says:

ya well maybe if i hadnt turned up stinking of lynx safari

BABY POISON says:

from french showering the fuck out of my clothes after PE

BABY POISON says:

his willy wouldn’t have been so floppy

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

guess its one of those mysteries we will never have an answer for

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

tho i maintain no amount of macho bodyspray will turn a real man off the smell of pussy

BABY POISON says:

franki ur real fucking gross u kno :D

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

maybe baby

franki farmer will have her revenge on saint james says:

but dont u kno I speak the truth

mrs tracey pitt says:

what i want to know is why mr alpin is suddenly making exceptions

mrs tracey pitt says:

its not fair

BABY POISON says:

ya not fair!!

mrs tracey pitt says:

i had to play in the volleyball tournament that time

mrs tracey pitt says:

i kept saying I wasn’t okay and then the next day i came down with mumps

mrs tracey pitt says:

remember that?

BABY POISON says:

u did!

BABY POISON says:

u looked like such an adorable little bunny

mrs tracey pitt says:

it was awful

mrs tracey pitt says: