Back Shelf Life Save as PDF
Chapters (39)
  1. Cover
  2. ABOUT THE AUTHOR
  3. Dedication
  4. Epigraph
  5. Shelf Life
  6. 04/01/2016
  7. 6 EGGS
  8. SANDWICH BREAD
  9. DIET COKE
  10. TAMPONS
  11. APPLES
  12. SUGAR
  13. DEO
  14. COTTON WOOL
  15. PIZZA
  16. WHOLE CHICKEN
  17. SPAGHETTI
  18. SOUP
  19. TOMATOES
  20. TEABAGS
  21. AFTERSHAVE
  22. WHITE WINE
  23. PRAWNS
  24. OLIVES
  25. MOBILE TOP-UP
  26. STRAWBERRIES
  27. HONEY
  28. MOISTURIZER
  29. DATES
  30. FLOWERS
  31. CONDITIONER
  32. SINGLE CREAM
  33. PULSES
  34. STEAK (LEAN)
  35. BLEACH
  36. SOME KIND OF PUDDING
  37. A Girl
  38. 11:09 04/01/2017
  39. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

In this dream I am living in a very large mansion in the state of Florida and my husband is a very rich man. I, on the other hand, am the kind of wife who is never seen in public without heels. I lift a finger to my cheek and feel the powder of my make-up. I am curled up on the sofa with a chilled glass of white. I am vaguely aware that my husband is out with his yacht, but I am not perturbed by the idea. The trip has been arranged with a lot of notice and he has made thorough preparations. Despite his absence, or perhaps because of it, tonight I am throwing a cocktail party and all the ingredients are lined up on the long marble table in the hall, so it looks like it’s happening soon. I am not fretting. I am having my nice, chilled glass of white in my nice sitting room. I look out of the bay window and realize there is a woman on the decking out back. I can see her from where I am sitting. She has a silk scarf around her head: it must be the sixties in the dream, or she has expensive sixties vintage taste. She is wearing big round sunglasses and holding a large portable telephone to her ear. She twirls her headscarf between her index finger and thumb. The home telephone rings and I pick up its heavy Bakelite receiver. ‘It’s about your husband,’ says the voice in my ear. I lift my eyes up and the woman is staring at me through the glass window. The light hits her sunglasses from behind, so I can see her dark eyes shining through the dark lenses. ‘Never get your heart broken twice,’ she says into the receiver and hangs up.

The day after I dream the third dream is the day before the big night.

CONDITIONER

The Girls

Now

There are creatures that only come out at night: bats, mice and owls. They all have their own specific cry. And fur or down or feathers designed to disappear into the night.