‘Just as a friend, but I’ve asked him not to,’ I plead with her. ‘I’ve told him about Jack and how we’ve moved in together, but sometimes, I guess when he’s had a drink or is feeling lonely after a gig, he sends me a late-night message that just smashes me into pieces. Why does he still have this effect on me, Emily? Why?’

Emily turns me round to face her, folds her arms and tilts her chin up just like our dad always does when he’s getting it tough emotionally or is going to make a point.

‘Because leaving each other or being apart was never a choice you made of your own free will, neither of you,’ she tells me emphatically. ‘You didn’t want to see him go to London and he didn’t want to go without you, Charlotte. Your feelings were never in your own control. You made a decision, not for you, but for others, and sometimes that happens in life. Do you still feel for him? If you do, you need to do the right thing by Jack and let him go, darling.’

Her words, although soft and subtle in tone, hit me like a freight train and I lose my breath for a second.

‘I can’t do that,’ I say, shaking my head again.

I think of how far Jack and I have come, of how no one on earth makes me feel as safe as he does when he wraps his strong arms around me. I think of some of the road trips we have taken together, how we’ve laughed at the silliest things, how excited he gets when I tell him about the kids at school and how much we lean on each other as we talk about our day when things don’t go as planned. I think of him asking me to move in when I was already living out of a drawer here most of the time anyhow, and how excited we were when we shopped for bits and bobs to make this place ‘ours’ more than ‘his’. I think of how I’ve moved on in my heart and mind so much and how I’ve healed by being with someone as tender, loving and strong as Jack. I would never throw all that away.

‘I love Jack,’ I tell my sister. ‘We have a great life here in this apartment and I’ve met some of my dearest friends through him. I couldn’t just up and leave.’