‘Well, that perked you up no end!’ she says, with sheer delight on her face. ‘If I’d known the suggestion of going to see Blind Generation would shake you up, I’d have told you the minute I got here. You go do your thing, Char baby. I’ll have another coffee, this time without the cigarette. What on earth was I thinking, smoking? I actually feel a bit sick now.’

But I don’t hear a word she’s saying. I make my way to the bathroom and, as I stand under the hot streaming water, all I can think of is that I’ve just agreed to go and hear Tom Farley sing live, in actual person. What the hell am I thinking agreeing to such a mad notion? I’m going to see him in the flesh for the first time in three years. I’m bringing my husband. And I’m going with my best friend who has absolutely no idea that I even know him – or knew him, should I say – in the first place.

It’s just a night out, I tell myself. It’s just a concert. And Tom Farley is just someone I used to know. It’s not going to change anything. Is it?

Chapter Eighteen

Wicklow, September 2018

‘Are you sure you’re going to be OK while I’m away?’ Jack asks, as he packs his bags for his journey to Montreal. ‘Ten days feels like a long time to leave you on your own when you’re not yourself at all.’

I hand him an extra two folded shirts I’ve ironed for him and get a wave of panic at the thought of being here for so long alone, but there’s no way I’m going to let him see my true feelings. This research trip to Montreal has been in his diary since the beginning of the year, and I know how much he has been looking forward to it. His father did it, his grandfather did it, and now it’s Jack’s turn to take the baton and continue the fascinating neurological studies his family are known for.

‘I’ve a stack of books to read, two more jobs to apply for and, who knows, I might even take up painting while you’re away,’ I say to him. ‘All those days skulking round the art gallery in Ardara have piqued my interest and I could do with something creative to feed my withering brain. The lovely lady who works there, Mary, is very inspiring and keeps urging me to give it a go, plus I spent a fortune on materials the last time I was in.’