Kiera started sobbing as she stared at me, still looking absolutely shocked. I couldn’t take it, couldn’t handle witnessing her pain. Not when this was all her fault. I didn’t break us…you did. Don’t cry for me now…now that it’s too late. Turning from her, I fled. I didn’t stop moving until I was in my car, didn’t let myself think or feel until I’d started my car. It wasn’t until I was pulling onto the street that it hit me. And when it did, it was like getting smacked with a wrecking ball—there was nothing of me left.

I managed to pull my car to the curb, managed to put it in park. And then I let out all the anger and pain I’d been holding onto. I yelled until my throat ached, sobbed until my eyes were dry, slammed the steering wheel so hard I nearly broke it. Tossing open the door, I started pacing the street. My hands were in my hair, yanking. My breaths were fast, my heart was pounding…and my stomach was rising. How could she do this to me? How the fuck could she do this to me? She’s having his baby.

Knowing I was about to lose it, I stumbled to the sidewalk, sank to my knees, and let myself throw up the bile in my empty stomach on a nearby berm. She’s pregnant. She’s fucking pregnant. Jesus…I can’t do this. I can’t deal with this. Haven’t I suffered enough for one lifetime? Why did the universe hate me so fucking much? Why was I so fucking unlovable?

Wiping my mouth, I sat back on my heels. What do I do now? How the fuck do I keep going? Where do I go?

Home. It was the only place I could think of.

Pushing myself to my feet, I forced myself back into the car…and tried to ignore the fact that it smelled like her. Goddamn it. Everything was going to remind me of her again, and this time it was going to hurt so much more, because this time…I had too much history to pull from. We’d had a year of being together, and it had been really fucking good. Or at least…I’d thought so. I guess she didn’t agree. I guess she needed more. Why was I never enough for her?

Lying my head back, I tried to take some deep, calming breaths. I needed to redirect my thoughts, focus on something besides the utter agony of losing her. And that was when I found it…my armor. My head snapped up as I wrapped myself in emotions I was extremely comfortable with: anger, hate, rage. That fucking, betraying bitch. I was better off without her.