All of us in the backstage area twisted to look over at who had yelled that. It was Kurt, one of the guys who was usually on our bus. He was on his cell phone, his face livid as he screamed at someone on the other end. “You’re such a fucking cunt! I never want to fucking see you again, you fucking whore! Go to hell!” After he said that, he threw his phone full force against the wall, breaking it.

Ice washed through me as I stared at him. We’d had multiple conversations about our girlfriends waiting for us back home, and the look on his face whenever he’d talked about his girl…it was like looking into a mirror. By the pure rage on his face now, I knew that had been her on the phone, and I knew exactly what she’d done to him. I wanted to go talk to him, help him in some way, but I was frozen in place, terrified of ever getting a phone call like that.

His bandmates swarmed him, but he held them off, too pissed to talk. Then his angry eyes scanned the room, and he shouted, “Who here wants to fuck me? Right now.”

As I watched, four girls scattered throughout the room started making a beeline for him. He grabbed the hand of the one who reached him first and started pulling her toward a hallway. I had to swallow the panic that was suddenly blocking my throat. It was like I was inside a nightmare, only I knew I wasn’t. I was awake, this was really happening. Jesus. Please don’t let that be me someday.

“That sucks,” I heard Evan say beside me. I twisted to look at him, and he nodded at where Kurt had disappeared with his…stress reliever. “He told me he just bought his girl a ring. He was gonna propose next time he saw her.”

It was like I’d been socked in the gut, and I instinctively hunched over. This was too much, too similar…too close to my greatest fear. Evan put a hand on my shoulder, his brow furrowed in concern. “You okay?”

I nodded, swallowing. I couldn’t let the parallel of our lives unhinge me. Kurt’s girlfriend had cheated, not mine. Kiera and I were good. She was good. She was faithful. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me.

Evan clapped my shoulder and stepped away while I was trying to redirect my dark thoughts. A girl suddenly appeared in my vision. Her cheeks were flushed, her pale eyes were shining, and she was biting her lip. “Hi…” she said, staring at my mouth.

I was still a little out of it. I couldn’t give her a polite smile, couldn’t be professional. I was just staring at her staring at me. My response was more instinctual than a coherent thought. “Hey…”