I check my phone just in case she has sent me a message, like sometimes she does. Night. Love you. Anything. Because she needs me as much as I need her.

But there’s nothing.

Through the open window, the familiar soundtrack leaks in: buses, the odd shout as someone walks home, sirens. In my bedroom, I wrap up in the muggy warmth of my sheets, feeling the weight of my body as I sink into the mattress. My head hurts from the beer and the chasers, and the strength it took to walk away from Michelle. A strength I don’t know how long I can maintain…

Chapter Twenty-Three

KAT

After a fitful night’s sleep, I’ve been wrapped up in a blanket on my sofa for the last hour, wondering what to do about Rhys. Susan, I can deal with. She’s on my ward, she’s not going anywhere, I can take my time. But Rhys? I can’t see him coming back any time soon, and yet I can’t help feeling he might need help. Someone to talk to. Whatever’s going on, he’s got issues.

He’s also still got Susan’s key.

Maybe I should organise for the locks to be changed. Would he go back? He was so… what? Confused? Angry? Frightened? I still can’t quite work it out. I see the crumpled-up piece of notebook paper behind the bin and thank the universe that I couldn’t be bothered to pick it up the other night. I’ll call him, ask him to meet me and get the key back. If he agrees, I’ll know we’re okay. If not, I guess I’ll call in the locksmith.

I unfurl the paper, tapping his number into my phone. It rings three times before he answers.

‘Yeah?’ He sounds as though I’ve woken him, all foggy and tired.

‘Did I wake you?’ I ask. ‘Sorry.’

‘Who’s this?’ he answers, his voice strained, as if he’s stretching out sleep.

‘It’s Kat…’ I twist my blanket around my fingers, pulling it up until I see the chipped polish on my toes. ‘You okay?’ I ask, tentatively.

‘Just about,’ he says, sounding bleary, distracted. Sounding anything but okay.

‘I realised you still have her key. I thought I should get it back.’

‘Stop me returning and ransacking the place?’

‘I wasn’t suggesting that,’ I say quickly.

‘Course not.’ He doesn’t sound convinced. ‘Look, I’ve got appointments all day. I can’t just swing by and drop it off.’

‘It’s fine, I can meet you. Where suits?’ I need to pin him down. If I can see him, I can check his eyes, see if he really is okay. He lets out a heavy breath. ‘I dunno, I’ve got to pick up some bits first. I’ll meet you at the train station in thirty minutes. Okay? If not, you’ll have to wait. Like I said, I’m busy.’

‘Okay, no problem.’ I get up and jog into my bedroom, pulling out a clean uniform to throw on. I can meet Rhys, go to the dress fitting, then get to work by one if I’m lucky. ‘Train station. Swing into the short stay, I’ll be waiting.’