It was her voice. A voice he knew well, the voice of the one he tried so very hard to keep happy. It was a voice that he could not escape, nor did he want to. It was hard and direct, but there was love in it as well. A hard sort of love that hed taken to heart and let mold him. Hed felt it through the years, and it had shaped the person he currently was; but now that he was an adult, the voice, like himself, had been hardened and cracked by the world. The voice had once been so sing-song and perfect but there were barbs and cracks in it now.

How much longer? the voice was telling him as he looked blankly out of the window. How many more times are you going to mess this up? You think we have forever?

He closed his eyes against her voice. It was sweet like music but also made him feel worthless. It rattled through his head like wind through dead leaves and made him think of the conversation hed had with the gentleman in front of Harbour Medical Group. He ran it through his head like a scene from a movie hed seen dozens of times, trying to figure out where hed gone wrong.

Sir, excuse me, but you have to help me.

What is it? Are you okay?

You need to come with me. I can explain better when you see…I just need you to come.

He reached out to touch the man, but the man jerked away. It wasnt that motion of disgust that made him pull out the knifeno, it was the way the man had looked at him. His eyes leered and his mouth tightened in disgust.

Get away from me. Ill call the pol

Hed stabbed the man before he knew it. His goal had been just one hard swipe across the neck, but some unexpected force had overtaken him. Hed barely even been in control of himself when the knife started moving. The first stab had felt like nothing more than play-acting, like he was a kid with a stick, playing the role of wanna-be ninja. But once he knew hed pierced the skin and everything had actually started, it had been easier. Something dark and lively had come over him and before he knew it, the man was dead in the parking lot.

After the man had died, hed gotten back into his car, the knife still dripping blood, the mans blood on his hands. It was the same car he currently sat in, waiting for his lunchbreak to be over so he could go back inside to this stupid, pointless job.

After killing the man, hed heard her voice for the better part of two hours, filling his head with screams one minute and whispers of encouragement the next.