The last time he’d been photographed was a few months ago when he was filming The Philadelphia Story. He’d been clean-cut and groomed in a dreamy 1940s-modern mash-up reminiscent of his predecessor, Cary Grant. He’d looked good, his jawline still razor-sharp with just the right amount of salt peppered through his dark hair.

There are a few people scattered about, but that famous jawline is nowhere to be seen.

My heart is fluttering at the base of my throat, and I hate how nervous I am.

Does Gabe feel the way that I do—the way I wish I didn’t—as if those three days ten years ago have been suspended in time? Perfectly frozen like a mosquito in amber.

I’m about to head inside, when I feel a hand on my elbow.

I turn, already knowing it’s him.

“Chani,” Gabe says.

He has a beard now.

But he still knows how to say my name.

Tell Me Something I Don’t Know
REVIEWS

Horowitz’s much-anticipated collection gathers some of her best works—including, of course, the infamous Gabe Parker interview—and includes some new pieces. Her writing sparkles with humor and wit. Reading it, you’ll feel like you’re talking to your best friend—if your best friend was the type of person who snuck out of the newest James Bond’s house in the middle of the night.

—Broad Sheets

Fans of Horowitz’s profiles will love Tell Me Something I Don’t Know. A fizzy, lighthearted read, it’s the perfect book to toss into your beach bag. You’ll tan while you giggle at her best hits—her Gabe Parker profile is of course the star of the collection—and grin at the new additions.

—Publishers Weekly

Tell Me Something I Don’t Know is a bubble bath in a book—soothing and calming, the perfect balm for the end of a long day. The collection revolves around her viral hit, “Gabe Parker: Shaken, Not Stirred,” and readers will wince again with embarrassment as she recounts how she blew her once-in-a-lifetime chance with the Bond star after attending a house party of his and passing out in his guest room.

—Kirkus Reviews

Apparently, Horowitz is a fairly beloved celebrity interviewer. This reviewer could not say how or why—even the profiles included in her collection of essays are self-serving and self-centered. Everything is about her. It’s kind of cute at first, the way it’s cute when your child asks you a precocious question, like “Daddy, why is the grass green?” But when that question is asked over and over and over again, it doesn’t seem cute. Instead, it seems likely that something is wrong with your child and their intelligence. One only has to read her infamous interview with Bond star Gabe Parker to realize exactly why she’s gotten any attention for her mediocre writing.

—Goodreads

Chani Horowitz is a slut.

—Reddit

Chapter 8

Chapter
8