“Herbivores,” Blaire corrected with a grin, “but good memory, Care Bear.”

“Herbivores,” Carrie repeated. “We can go, right, Mom?”

“Of course. Let me put some sneakers on while you put some snacks in your backpack. Ax, can you come upstairs and help me?” she asked, tilting her head toward the stairs. I followed Blaire up the stairs and to the left, and we entered a bedroom with oak furnishings and a large bed with a fluffy light gray comforter and deep pillows. There was a man’s sport coat lying on a chair in the corner.

“Whose room is this?” I asked suspiciously.

“Mine and Evan’s,” she replied nonchalantly, walking through the bathroom to a huge walk-in closet as I followed her.

“You… you share a room?” I stammered, feeling like someone had just dunked my head in boiling water. “But there’s only one bed!”

She gave me a deadpan look over her shoulder. “Trust me. That’s the most platonic bed in this entire city.” Noticing my outraged look, she continued, “We share a bedroom, Ax, but we have our own bathrooms for privacy when we’re dressing. The most Evan has ever seen of my body has been in a swimsuit. Even when I was pregnant and couldn’t get in and out of the bathtub by myself, I started taking showers because neither of us was comfortable with him helping me.”

Well, that took me down a fucking notch or ten. I imagined Blaire, with her beautiful, round stomach, not able to take her beloved baths because she didn’t have anyone to help her in and out of the tub. I should have been there. I should have been in the bathtub with her massaging her feet, her shoulders, or whatever else needed massaging. My hands on her belly while she leaned back against me. Smiling at each other as Carrie moved inside her. Kissing. Intimacy.

“I’m sorry,” I said quietly. For so many things.

“I know, babe,” she said as she kissed me and headed back to sit on the bed. I leaned against the doorframe of the bathroom and watched her put on her black sneakers. Did Evan have to help her with that too when she was heavy with my child and couldn’t reach her feet? “Now, about the zoo. Axel, are you sure about this? It can be a lot taking her somewhere. She’s very… energetic.”

I scoffed. “Blaire, I go up against two-hundred-and-fifty-pound defensive backs every week. I think I can keep up with a forty-pound little girl.”

29. Blaire

Blaire

Approximately eight hours later, Axel and I were slumped on his couch, totally exhausted. “Holy shit, she’s got a lot of energy,” Ax breathed heavily. “My fucking hair even hurts.”