He frowned and looked up at the nurse. ‘She’s still a little woozy with all the pain meds so give her time,’ she said.

This had happened before, me waking up in hospital and not being able to speak except this time, my mum and dad weren’t there. Seren wasn’t there. And I wasn’t in England. I was a million miles away from everything, including parts of my own body. I could move both my feet – that was something. I could wiggle my toes – I could slide my foot back and forth across under the sheet. And I could hold Raf’s hand with my right hand and I could squeeze it. But my left hand was useless. And I couldn’t remember how to speak.

‘Her eyes look … different.’

‘We had to take out her contacts,’ said María del Carmen. ‘They’re right there.’ She pointed to a little pot on the bedside cabinet.

The nurse explained to Raf what she’d explained to me in a hushed voice, like I couldn’t hear. I was ‘probably in delayed shock’ because I’d ‘experienced a massive trauma’ and I ‘had a lot of medication’ in my system. Raf held my head against his own, stroking my cheek. He smelled of coffee and fabric conditioner. I wanted to go to back to sleep in his arms.

When she had gone, he sat there looking at me.

‘Hey, you. You scared the crap out of me. When you didn’t show up at the hotel I went on up to the house to find you. And boy did I find you.’

I looked at him, willing him to read my mind.

‘I can’t believe what they did to you, mi niña hermosa.’ He kissed my face. ‘Can you remember anything? Me, Dad and Nico found you. And that woman, Celestina and her kids. She put your hand on ice. She saved it.’

I blinked, hoping he’d read my mind again, like the nurse had.

‘You gotta be real careful with it for a few weeks. You were in surgery for a whole day. Celestina said you saved her kids from that guy Paco? Was it him who chained you up? Are you in any pain? He beat you up pretty good. Did he make you wear coloured contacts? Was it like LA Confidential and you had to dress up like … How the hell did you even get involved with a cartel?’

I closed my eyes and nuzzled into his neck.

‘I’m sorry. You don’t have to talk about all this now, I’m sorry.’ He kissed me all over my face. ‘You’re safe, that’s the main thing.’

My throat was so dry and I looked behind him at the cabinet where there was a water jug and a cup. I reached out to it and he poured me some. I drank two whole glasses before he spoke again.