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Back Counting Down with You Save as PDF
Chapters (64)
  1. Cover
  2. About the Author
  3. Praise
  4. Booklist
  5. Dedication
  6. AUTHOR’S NOTE
  7. Part 1
  8. 1
  9. 2
  10. 3
  11. 4
  12. 5
  13. 6
  14. 7
  15. 8
  16. 9
  17. 10
  18. 11
  19. 12
  20. 13
  21. 14
  22. 15
  23. 16
  24. 17
  25. 18
  26. 19
  27. Part 2
  28. 20
  29. 21
  30. 22
  31. 23
  32. 24
  33. 25
  34. 26
  35. 27
  36. 28
  37. 29
  38. 30
  39. 31
  40. 32
  41. 33
  42. Part 3
  43. 34
  44. 35
  45. 36
  46. 37
  47. 38
  48. 39
  49. 40
  50. 41
  51. 42
  52. 43
  53. 44
  54. 45
  55. 46
  56. 47
  57. 48
  58. 49
  59. 50
  60. 51
  61. 52
  62. 53
  63. 54
  64. ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

This thing with Ace and me is so fragile that I’m afraid it’ll shatter in the face of its first obstacle. I have to find a way to make this work. I don’t know how, but I have to.

I don’t know if I’m ready to lose this.

28

T-MINUS 16 DAYS

Friday rolls around, and Ace and I find ourselves at Pietra’s Sweet Tooth, studying. He suddenly closes The Scarlet Letter with a loud thud that makes me jump in my seat. “Can we talk? Seriously?”

“Uh. Yes?” My tongue feels like it’s glued to the roof of my mouth.

Maybe my study guides aren’t working for him. I have a few different methods that we can try if that’s the problem. I can’t work on any of them tonight, because I have to go to my cousin Sana’s birthday party, but I can start this weekend.

“Karina...” Ace sighs, running a hand through his dark hair. “There’s—we’re so different.”

My heart falls. I should’ve been expecting that. This is when he’s going to tell me all of this is a mistake. Everything we’ve done these last two weeks was for nothing. I knew it was coming. I knew he wouldn’t want anything to do with me after our study sessions, but I didn’t think he’d get tired of me this quickly.

Maybe Dadu’s concern yesterday was the universe warning me.

“I know,” I whisper. I don’t think I can speak any louder.

“I don’t know how to say this,” Ace says, his expression troubled. “I don’t know if I’m allowed to. But I can’t sit here and just...not say anything anymore.”

“Just say it,” I say, bracing myself for the blow, tightly gripping the edge of the table.

“I didn’t realize until yesterday,” Ace says, toying with the rings on his fingers instead of looking at me. “I mean, I had an inkling but I didn’t realize the full extent of it.”

“Ace, just say it.” I grit my teeth together and try to focus on the sunflower painting on the wall instead of Ace. “You don’t want to study together anymore.”

“What?” Ace looks up in surprise. “No. No, Jesus Christ. I’d love to study with you forever.”

The words feel like a balm against my skin but they leave behind a deeper itching. “So what’s the problem?”

“You,” he says, a muscle jumping in his jaw. “Your willingness to put everyone and everything above your own needs.”

I nearly stop breathing. “What?”

“Everything you do, you do because of other people. What do you do for yourself? Is there anything you do for yourself?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”