‘Of course she couldn’t have known beforehand Leena,’ says a chorus of voices. The twins are standing on either side of the door.

‘Had she known, she could have done her article much earlier,’ says Nisha/Rajni.

‘And it would have been much juicier,’ says Rajni/Nisha.

‘Can anyone tell me what you’re talking about?’ I ask, exasperated.

‘Polly,’ Comma says softly, ‘I think you better read—Virgin Bride’s vile blog.’

Comma gives me a look—of commiseration?—and she walks out of the room.

I don’t go to my desk immediately. I walk to the pantry. I eye the coffee longingly but I know caffeine harms the baby so I fill up a glass with water instead. I drink the water slowly and walk back to my desk trying to make sense of things.

I was so sure I was going to be fired and now suddenly I am being asked to read the blog. I also notice some people looking at me curiously.

What does all this have to do with the blog? Is it because of my article? My heart beating very fast, I sit down on my chair, open a browser and start reading.

Vindaloo & Vibrators

Get them by the balls & their hearts & minds will follow

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Kaama versus Maama

Porn to be wild

Drunk sex is not honest sex

Fake it for fuck’s sake

The virgin & the whore

Easy cum, easy go

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Easy cum, easy go

I am sick of you dear readers. I am sick of the comments you write. I am sick of knowing what you think of me. I am sick of your righteousness. Of the piety you apparently have in your lives. I am sick of those who write in to say they love their husbands/wives.

But mostly I am sick of those who email me with details about their pathetic and failing marriages. I am sick of women who write in saying they admire me for my ‘honesty and frankness’, of women who write in asking for advice.

Are you fucking stupid? Have you even read this blog? I don’t know how to save marriages, not yours, not mine.

The Hubby told me last night that he’s leaving me. Or will leave me shortly. I know you didn’t see it coming. What can I say? I didn’t see it coming either.

Hubby has always told me about the women he’s been sleeping with. He meets them at or through work. He’s always had a knack of picking up women who have a potential to grow professionally. You can say he has an eye for them, hah.

He spots them, fucks them and then helps them in their careers. Sometimes if he so fancies, he might even help some woman without fucking her.