Anytime now I’ll be going in for the ultrasound. Apparently it’s called ‘foetal dating’—they tell you the baby’s age. It’s ironic really—I wanted Sid to accompany me for the ultrasound and now he will—only the circumstances are so different from what I’d imagined.

However and despite what has happened in the last two days, I’m super excited—I’m going to see my baby!

‘Mrs and Mr Sharma?’ the nurse calls out.

Sid joins me reluctantly but I’m glad he’s here with me. Despite his declaration of love for Lalita, I can’t help but hope—maybe, just maybe, looking at his own child might change his heart?

I know he has had sex with her but I think—I think I can forgive that. With time I and the baby can make him get over her as well. All I need is time. I don’t want my marriage to end.

‘This will feel cold,’ the radiologist says before he squishes some gel on the lower part of my abdomen. I nod and stare at the black screen. It doesn’t make much sense to me.

I’ve never had an ultrasound before and I wonder if I’ll be able to see my intestines. Suddenly the screen comes to life with—with a lot of white stuff and a black hole in the centre.

‘That’s your uterus,’ the radiologist says, pointing to the black hole. ‘And this—,’ he says pointing to a blob-like structure inside the uterus, ‘this is your baby.’

He does something that looks like putting plus signs around the blob and he smiles.

‘Look,’ he says, smiling some more, ‘See those sticks? That’s your baby’s heart beat. Look at how fast it beats!’

He picks up something that looks like a torch with a cord and puts it to his ear and then he puts it to mine. There is a very rapid but soft thump-thump coming through it.

‘That’s your baby’s heartbeat,’ he says. ‘The device is called a Doppler.’

I look at the little thing on the screen, I see the sticks and I hear the beats—my baby, so tiny, so perfect.

‘Can’t we get a close-up?’ I ask without taking my eyes off the screen.

The radiologist laughs.

‘You won’t see anything clearly. Your baby’s too tiny, the size of a prune with a huge head and small arms and legs. It can make a fist with its fingers, though. If you come back to us around twelve weeks, I’ll make you a DVD of your ultrasound and you can watch it at home,’ the radiologist says.

‘I would love a DVD!’ I say and grin at the radiologist.

My little babu can make a fist!

‘Congratulations to both of you,’ the radiologist says. ‘Would you like to hear the heartbeat, sir?’ he asks Sid.