Addison took a deep breath and opened her eyes. The words were right there. In her mind and in her heart, they screamed to be spoken, but deep down inside of her was fear. Put there by a man who scorned her, who rebutted her love with ugliness and hatred, the pain of which scarred her soul and erected walls Addison wasn’t sure she’d ever be able to scale. To show love was easy. In a touch, in a breath, in a kiss gentle and soft she could display the feelings she had for Joanna, but each time she had spoken those words to the man who was her father, they had been tossed back in her face with a slap that sent her young body spiraling across a room.

“Hey, you in there?” Joanna said, placing her hand gently on Addison’s chest.

“What?” Addison said, blankly looking back at Joanna.

“You were a million miles away.”

“Sorry,” Addison said with a shake of her head. “Just lost in my thoughts.”

“Good thoughts?”

It was neither the time nor the place, and Addison wasn’t sure if there’d ever be a time she could share the nightmare of her youth, so she shoved the memories aside and replaced it with something far more pleasant. As a hearty chuckle rose in her throat, she rolled Joanna to the mattress, and climbing on top of her, Addison said, “I’ll leave that up to you to decide.”

Chapter Thirty-Nine

Two months later...

Joanna looked at her watch and couldn’t suppress a giggle as she remembered Addison’s disapproval when she had been late for dinner so many months before. Debating on whether she should turn the tables, she lost her train of thought when Addison rushed into the room.

“The bloody meeting ran long,” Addison said as she went over and gave Joanna a light kiss on the lips. “Sorry, I’m late.”

“You’re not the only one,” Joanna said, watching as Addison went to take her place at the other end of the table.

Addison made it halfway to her chair before she stopped and slowly turned around. Joanna’s eyes were sparkling, and in an instant, all the air rushed from Addison’s lungs. Returning to Joanna’s side, Addison knelt down, unconsciously lowering her eyes to Joanna’s belly. “Are you sure?”

Joanna bobbed her head. “Yes, I’m sure. I didn’t want you to know until I was positive, but the ultrasound today confirmed it.”

“Are you okay?”

“Yes, I’m fine. A little queasy this morning, but I’m good,” Joanna said. “How about you? You look a little pasty.”

“Yeah...um...I just...I just didn’t think it would happen on the first try. I mean you always read about people trying and trying and trying again.”

“Well, it doesn’t seem we have a problem in that department.”