Back Best Served Cold Save as PDF
Contents ( 90)
  1. Benna Murcatto Saves a Life
  2. I
  3. TALINS
  4. Land of Opportunity
  5. The Bone-Thief
  6. Fish out of Water
  7. Six and One
  8. Bloody Instructions
  9. II
  10. WESTPORT
  11. Poison
  12. Science and Magic
  13. The Safest Place in the World
  14. Evil Friends
  15. Two Twos
  16. Plans and Accidents
  17. Repaid in Full
  18. III
  19. SIPANI
  20. Fogs and Whispers
  21. The Arts of Persuasion
  22. The Life of the Drinker
  23. Left Out
  24. A Few Bad Men
  25. The Peacemakers
  26. Cooking up Trouble
  27. Sex and Death
  28. That’s Entertainment
  29. What Happened
  30. IV
  31. VISSERINE
  32. Vengeance, Then
  33. Downwards
  34. Rats in a Sack
  35. The Forlorn Hope
  36. Mercy and Cowardice
  37. The Odd Couple
  38. Darkness
  39. The Connoisseur
  40. Vile Jelly
  41. Other People’s Scores
  42. The Fencing Master
  43. V
  44. PURANTI
  45. Sixes
  46. The Eye-Maker
  47. Prince of Prudence
  48. Neither Rich nor Poor
  49. Heroic Efforts, New Beginnings
  50. The Traitor
  51. King of Poisons
  52. No Worse
  53. Harvest Time
  54. The Old New Captain General
  55. VI
  56. OSPRIA
  57. His Plan of Attack
  58. Politics
  59. No More Delays
  60. All Business
  61. The Fate of Styria
  62. To the Victors…
  63. So Much for Nothing
  64. Shifting Sands
  65. VII
  66. TALINS
  67. Return of the Native
  68. The Lion’s Skin
  69. Preparation
  70. Rules of War
  71. One Nation
  72. All Dust
  73. The Inevitable
  74. Thus the Whirligig…
  75. Seeds
  76. All Change
  77. Happy Endings
  78. Acknowledgments
  79. extras
  80. meet the author
  81. interview
  82. introducing
  83. By Joe Abercrombie
  84. Praise for Best Served Cold
  85. Praise for The Heroes
  86. Praise for The Blade Itself
  87. Praise for Before They Are Hanged
  88. Praise for Last Argument of Kings
  89. Contents
  90. Copyright

“Look.” Andiche rested one lazy hand on the arm of the captain general’s chair and dusted the seat off with the other. “We don’t doubt for a moment that when it comes to a fight, you’re the best damn general a man could ask for.”

“Then what’s the problem?”

Victus’ face twisted into a snarl. “We don’t want to fight! We want to make… fucking… money!”

“Who ever brought you more money than me?”

“Ahem,” came a voice right in her ear. Monza jerked round, and froze, hand halfway to the hilt of her sword. Standing just behind her, with a faintly embarrassed smile, was Nicomo Cosca.

He’d shaved off his moustache, and all his hair besides, left only a black and grey stubble over his knobbly skull, his sharp jaw. The rash had faded to a faint pink splash up the side of his neck. His eyes were less sunken, his face no longer trembling or beaded with sweat. But the smile was the same. The faint little smile and the playful gleam in his dark eyes. The same he used to have, when she first met him.

“A delight to see you both well.”

“Uh,” grunted Shivers. Monza found she’d made a kind of strangled cough, but no words came with it.

“I am in resplendent health, your concern for my welfare is most touching.” Cosca strolled past, slapping a puzzled-looking Shivers on the back, more captains of the Thousand Swords pushing their way through the flap after him and spreading out around the edges of the tent. Men whose names, faces, qualities, or lack of them, she knew well. A thick-set man with a stoop, a worn coat and almost no neck came at the rear. He raised his heavy brows at her as he passed.

“Friendly?” she hissed. “I thought you were going back to Talins!”

He shrugged, as if it was nothing. “Didn’t make it all the way.”

“So I fucking see!”

Cosca stepped up onto the packing cases and turned to the assembly with a self-satisfied flourish. He’d acquired a grand black breastplate with golden scrollwork from somewhere, a sword with a gilded hilt, fine black boots with shining buckles. He settled himself into the captain general’s chair with as much pomp as an Emperor into his throne, Friendly standing watchful beside the cases, arms crossed. As Cosca’s arse touched the wood the tent broke into polite applause, every captain tapping their fingers against their palms as daintily as fine ladies attending the theatre. Just as they had for Monza, when she stole the chair. If she hadn’t felt suddenly so sick she might almost have laughed.

Cosca waved away the applause while obviously encouraging it. “No, no, really, entirely undeserved. But it’s good to be back.”

“How the hell—”

“Did I survive? The wound, it appears, was not quite so fatal as we all supposed. The Talinese took me, on account of my uniform, for one of their own, and bore me directly to an excellent surgeon, who was able to staunch the bleeding. I was two weeks abed, then slipped out of a window. I made contact in Puranti with my old friend Andiche, who I had gathered might be desirous of a change in command. He was, and so were all his noble fellows.” He gestured to the captains scattered about the tent, then to himself. “And here I am.”