Back Best Served Cold Save as PDF
Contents ( 90)
  1. Benna Murcatto Saves a Life
  2. I
  3. TALINS
  4. Land of Opportunity
  5. The Bone-Thief
  6. Fish out of Water
  7. Six and One
  8. Bloody Instructions
  9. II
  10. WESTPORT
  11. Poison
  12. Science and Magic
  13. The Safest Place in the World
  14. Evil Friends
  15. Two Twos
  16. Plans and Accidents
  17. Repaid in Full
  18. III
  19. SIPANI
  20. Fogs and Whispers
  21. The Arts of Persuasion
  22. The Life of the Drinker
  23. Left Out
  24. A Few Bad Men
  25. The Peacemakers
  26. Cooking up Trouble
  27. Sex and Death
  28. That’s Entertainment
  29. What Happened
  30. IV
  31. VISSERINE
  32. Vengeance, Then
  33. Downwards
  34. Rats in a Sack
  35. The Forlorn Hope
  36. Mercy and Cowardice
  37. The Odd Couple
  38. Darkness
  39. The Connoisseur
  40. Vile Jelly
  41. Other People’s Scores
  42. The Fencing Master
  43. V
  44. PURANTI
  45. Sixes
  46. The Eye-Maker
  47. Prince of Prudence
  48. Neither Rich nor Poor
  49. Heroic Efforts, New Beginnings
  50. The Traitor
  51. King of Poisons
  52. No Worse
  53. Harvest Time
  54. The Old New Captain General
  55. VI
  56. OSPRIA
  57. His Plan of Attack
  58. Politics
  59. No More Delays
  60. All Business
  61. The Fate of Styria
  62. To the Victors…
  63. So Much for Nothing
  64. Shifting Sands
  65. VII
  66. TALINS
  67. Return of the Native
  68. The Lion’s Skin
  69. Preparation
  70. Rules of War
  71. One Nation
  72. All Dust
  73. The Inevitable
  74. Thus the Whirligig…
  75. Seeds
  76. All Change
  77. Happy Endings
  78. Acknowledgments
  79. extras
  80. meet the author
  81. interview
  82. introducing
  83. By Joe Abercrombie
  84. Praise for Best Served Cold
  85. Praise for The Heroes
  86. Praise for The Blade Itself
  87. Praise for Before They Are Hanged
  88. Praise for Last Argument of Kings
  89. Contents
  90. Copyright

Shivers took one last look at the farm before he followed, shaking his head. There’s nothing worse’n too much plan, that’s true. But too little comes in close behind.

Morveer blinked. “But…” He took a slow step towards Day. His ankle wobbled and he slumped sideways against the table, knocking over a flask and making the fizzing contents spill across the wood. He clutched one hand to his throat, his skin flushing, burning. He knew already what she must have done, the realisation spreading out frigid through his veins. He knew already what the consequences would have to be. “The King…” he rasped, “of Poisons?”

“What else? Caution first, always.”

He grimaced, at the meagre pain of the tiny prick in his arm, and at the far deeper wound of bitter betrayal besides. He coughed, fell forwards onto his knees, one hand stretching, trembling upwards. “But—”

Day kicked his hand away with the toe of one shoe. “Doomed to be misunderstood?” Her face was twisted with contempt. With hatred, even. The pleasing mask of obedience, of admiration, of innocence too, finally dropped. “What do you think there is to understand about you, you swollen-headed parasite? You’re thin as tissue paper!” There was the deepest cut of all—ingratitude, after all he had given her! His knowledge, his money, his… fatherly affection! “The personality of a baby in the body of a murderer! Bully and coward in one. Castor Morveer, greatest poisoner in the world? Greatest bore in the world, maybe, you—”

He sprang forwards with consummate nimbleness, nicked her ankle with his scalpel as he passed, rolled under the table and came up on the other side, grinning at her through the complexity of apparatus, the flickering flames of the burners, the distorting shapes of twisted tubes, the glinting surfaces of glass and metal.

“Ha ha!” He shouted, entirely alert and not dying in the least. “You, poison me? The great Castor Morveer, undone by his assistant? I think not!” She stared down at her bleeding ankle, and then up at him, eyes wide. “There is no King of Poisons, fool!” he cackled. “The method I showed you, that produces a liquid that smells, tastes and looks like water? It makes water! Entirely harmless! Unlike the concoction with which I just now pricked you, which was enough to kill a dozen horses!”

He slipped his hand inside his shirt, deft fingertips unerringly selecting the correct vial and sliding it out into the light. Clear fluid gleamed inside. “The antidote.” She winced as she saw it, made to dive one way around the table then came the other, but her feet were clumsy and he evaded her with negligible effort. “Most undignified, my dear! Chasing each other around our apparatus, in a barn, in the middle of rural Styria! Most terribly undignified!”

“Please,” she hissed at him. “Please, I’ll… I’ll—”

“Don’t embarrass us both! You have displayed your true nature now, you… you ingrate harpy! You are unmasked, you treacherous cuckoo!”

“I didn’t want to take the blame is all! Murcatto said sooner or later you’d go over to Orso! That you’d want to use me as the scapegoat! Murcatto said—”