I watch Aminah and how happy she is in this moment, wild curly hair blowing in the wind, eyes alight. ‘I love you,’ I say. ‘I’ll love you forever.’

The house crumbles for good, and I let it take me down with it. But I know I’ll rise again, like a phoenix rises from its ashes. Just maybe not today.

I’m back at Mum’s hospital bedside now, and I know it’s time. I don’t need to make a grand speech, don’t need to say anything. I stroke the hair on her face, the bracelet dangling from my wrist, and breathe in the scent of het perfume.

I look at my mother for the last time. We’ll never have the chance to make new memories together, or make up for the bad ones. But we have our old memories – good and bad – and I know they’ll be imprinted in my heart for the rest of my life.

I kiss Mum on the forehead, my tears seeping into her skin.

Winning the game was never going to save Mum. I realize that now. But maybe – just maybe – it saved me.

Some days later

Lady doesn’t bark when the bell rings, like she knows what’s coming.

When I open the door I see them standing there: Rawan and Aunt Zaina.

‘Hi, Safiya,’ Rawan says, smiling, though there are tears in her eyes. Her accent is just as pronounced as I remember, and it sounds like coming home.

Aunt Zaina pulls me in for a hug. ‘We’re very excited to meet you,’ she says, sounding exactly as she did on the phone.

Rawan has short hair, styled curly. Aunt Zaina wears a headscarf.

I smile up at my aunt and Mum’s best friend. ‘Hello,’ I say, with confidence. ‘I’m so happy to finally meet you both.’

Acknowledgements

Thank you to The Society of Authors for supporting this book with their Authors’ Foundation grant.

Thank you to all of the people who helped answer my research questions; Hammad Al Najjar, for teaching me about theatre culture in Kuwait and Mark Clayton, Matthew Nichols, and Dr Andrew D Sampson for your professional medical insight. Any inaccuracies in the book are entirely my own.

A huge thank you to Claire, super-agent extraordinaire (that rhymes, which makes it official). I’m fairly certain you own a time turner because there’s no other way you can possibly do everything you do. You are lovely and wise, and I want to be like you when I grow up (if that ever happens). Thank you to the rest of the RCW team: Sam for your foreign rights prowess, and Miriam for being so lovely about my silly emails.