BooksBarbecue
Back Thin Skin Save as PDF
Chapters (55)
  1. Cover
  2. Title Page
  3. Copyright
  4. Dedication
  5. Acknowledgments
  6. Cast of Characters
  7. Part One
  8. One
  9. Two
  10. Three
  11. Four
  12. Five
  13. Six
  14. Seven
  15. Eight
  16. Nine
  17. Ten
  18. Eleven
  19. Twelve
  20. Thirteen
  21. Fourteen
  22. Fifteen
  23. Sixteen
  24. Seventeen
  25. Eighteen
  26. Nineteen
  27. Part Two
  28. Twenty
  29. Twenty-one
  30. Twenty-two
  31. Twenty-three
  32. Twenty-four
  33. Twenty-five
  34. Twenty-six
  35. Twenty-seven
  36. Twenty-eight
  37. Twenty-nine
  38. Thirty
  39. Thirty-one
  40. Thirty-two
  41. Thirty-three
  42. Thirty-four
  43. Thirty-five
  44. Thirty-six
  45. Thirty-seven
  46. Thirty-eight
  47. Thirty-nine
  48. Forty
  49. Forty-one
  50. Forty-two
  51. Forty-three
  52. Forty-four
  53. Forty-five
  54. Forty-six
  55. A note on the Author

“For our whole relationship, through all the ups and downs, I never allowed myself to stare at the ceiling. I’ve stared at the blinds, the carpet, the electrical fixtures, the en suite bathroom, and the walk-in closet. But not the ceiling. I can’t look up. Whenever I look up in Hollywood, I see clouds in the shape of silicone implants and out-of-work actors. If I look up, I’ll fall. I always turn on my side before I let myself do that.

“Before, when we were still on the East Coast, we’d have a fight and I would just get a cab back to my mom’s. But there is no cab in the world that can give you back the last ten years of your life. Do you understand?”

“I think so.”

“Look. I’m in great shape. I’m really a rather ordinary-looking woman. But I’m well turned out. I worked hard at it. From the night we married, I did five hundred sit-ups a day, starting right there in our wedding suite. Then one day I realized, staring at nobody’s floor, with my everywife life, that the deep, deep curve was a straight line.”

“You didn’t just gain weight?”

“I don’t gain weight. I don’t eat.” She lit another cigarette. “So I glanced at the dressing-table photos. Us at a premiere, him in Armani, me in a Dolce gown, my waist nipped in, his arm around it. I raised the duvet and looked at him. Vodka was seeping through his pores. But he was thinner, tanner, tauter than when I first met him. He looked better than ever. Tentatively, knowing already what I would find, I dragged my palms from my ribs to my hips. The curve was gone. And I could not let him have it. So you see, in the end it really had nothing to do with you at all.”

“You look curvy to me,” enthused Ruby, delighted with the tale.

“You know what, honey?” laughed Rachel, stretching her hands above her head as if to emphasize the point. “I feel curvy.”

Twenty-six

image
Critical respect

I fell in love with the kid, I really did. I worried about her right away. At first she just seems like this obnoxious little brat. But she is very fragile. I don’t know what she is doing, depending upon the kindness of strangers at such a young age. That’s so dangerous at the age she is, the profession that she works in. The city she lives in. There is no depending in New York and definitely no kindness. There are strangers, though. She got that part right.