We try tae walk oot casual. It’s nae use. There’s another three shop workers shown up noo cos the shoutin n commotion, aw big cunts tryin tae grab us. A’m flyin rights oot on the shop floor n cunts ir tryin tae grab me. It’s a riot. Even helpful passers-by ir intervenin n grabbin at us, assumin that we’re shoplifters on the run. We’re runnin fur the exit n two polis in hi-vis jakits run in. Big Kenzie gets grabbed aff a fat wan n he’s caught a beaut. The other wan slide tackles me tae the floor n A’m gittin pulled oot fae under a table wae insurance leaflets n two shocked big wumen in yellow n black fleeces. The two ae us git dragged back tae the toilets in cuffs. ‘Is that the two?’ the first screw says tae the guard, his mate holdin paper towels tae his burst nose.

‘Aye, that’s the wee bastards!’ N that’s it. A glance at Eck being lifted up – he’s dazed n doesnae really know where he is. The last thing A see before A’m marched oot is a wee pool ae blood, dark purple under the blue light in the toilet.

Toffey and Other Suites

It’s the usual pish in the cells. A’m sittin in ma white socks, filthy noo wae black soles fae the mockit floor. A’ve git the blue mat, bare walls n concrete step fur a bed. Ma wee curtain sheet is roon us like a nun’s wimple. A’ve no even git the alcohol-related drowsiness that A kin just crash oot n forget. A’m stuck here tae brood n ponder ma condition n fate. What wid the repercussions be fur this stunt? A’m eighteen noo. They irnae goin tae take any pish excuses aboot being a wee guy. We’ve been charged wae actual bodily harm, assault, resisting arrest, vandalism n, tae tap it aw aff, a fuckin breach ae the peace. We wid needty see wit the PF wid make ae that. A’ve never been tae the jail but that’s nae guarantee against a custodial shoved right up yir arse. The polis ir sayin this n sayin that, aboot how evil we ir n how we attacked a vulnerable addict in a toilet and became violent wae security, police and members ae the public who intervened, fire n fuckin brimstone. A feel shite fur Eck. Their clique hud drifted fae us in the last years. Bailey, Whytey, Eck n McColl hud aw been on it, allegedly. Yi never repeated rumours like that but, no aboot yir ain team. It’s still taboo. While we fought n drank, took pills n went tae the big raves, they headed doon a significantly darker route n wan n aw faded away tae nuhin.

There’s a strange sanity tae it aw fur us, like aw this is a natural continuation ae those first rights ae passage. The days ae being wee neds in a gang ir long gone. People our age ir movin on n gittin on wae their lives. Yi huv polis officers, trainee teachers n aw manner ae good professions acceptin cunts our age. Wit ir we dain? Still hangin on tae suhin which is awready behind us. Sittin wae our school pals drinkin n takin drugs n chasin that eld buzz. It’s an ideal, a nostalgia. Collective loyalty n belonging. The notion ae that collective union hus slipped away fae us. Those who keep chasin it beyond our age ir trapped in never-never land forever.