In the shower cubicle she took her time, leaning at an angle with her palms against the smooth jade tiled walls so that the fierce jets of hot water could pummel her head. To have raised any maternal alarm bells was the last thing she had intended. She was fine. It was just a question of staying strong, finding a moment to talk to Matteo, riding it out. To burden her mother wouldn’t be fair. Unlike many of her girlfriends, the pair of them had never had one of those emotionally clingy types of relationships anyway. They were more separate, which didn’t mean less loving, and Lily had always thought that cool.

Lily tipped her face up to the wheel of the shower head, forcing herself to keep her eyes open as the tears streamed. It stung like fuck, but the pain was at least something else to focus on.

As she passed through Reception ten minutes later her heart sank ungratefully at the sight of her mother, already seated at one of the elegant round tables on the fringes of the entrance café, overseeing the receipt of a pot of tea, two cups, and a plate of biscuits. She must have changed with lightning speed and looked striking and bright-eyed in her lovely blue silk shirt – one that Lily hadn’t seen before and had already complimented her on.

Lily quickly shoved on her sunglasses as she approached, not wanting to provoke any comments on the bloodshot state of her eyes. ‘Wow, Mum, thanks, but, like I said, I’ve really—’

‘Lily, darling, please just sit down. A cup of tea. A biscuit.’

‘Thanks, Mum, but – and please don’t take this wrong – tea would make me need to pee on the drive and I am afraid I literally do not have time for…’ Lily gestured helplessly at the table, weighing up her own heartlessness as her gaze travelled over, not only all the tea things, but her mother’s iPhone, parked by the little pot and lit up with the exuberant message:

EXCITED FOR OUR TUESDAY DINNER DATE! C XXX

‘I’ve told Matt I’m on my way – he’s already cooking supper,’ she went on quickly, pressing one hand on her mother’s shoulder to keep her seated as she bent to kiss her cheek. ‘So, please, just enjoy your tea, Mum. I’m really glad we had today and we’ll talk soon.’

Her mother stood up to pull her close. ‘Such a lovely birthday present, darling, thank you.’

‘Great, Mum. For me too. Forgive me for shooting off, okay?’

‘Of course.’

Lily squeezed hard as they embraced, aware of gripping something tightly deep inside herself. She took a gulp of her mum’s familiar scent, and then a second, before pulling free and striding towards the big foyer doors.

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