When I drive out of the estate I see a Costa coffee shop on the opposite side of the road so I park my car outside. I’m about to get out when the phone rings. It’s Amber.

‘Where are you?’ she says. I want to say ‘Mind your own business’ but instead I say, ‘I’m going to visit someone, Amber. Why?’

‘Dad didn’t know where you’d gone.’

‘Oh, I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you where I was going, Amber… after all, you or your father would never leave the house without telling me where you were, now would you?’ Silence at the far end of the phone. Amber does not expect sarcasm from her Mammy, that’s her job. Oh God, I shouldn’t have done that. Upsetting her. She has enough to deal with without her mother turning on her.

‘Are you there, sweetie?’ I ask, picturing her at the far end of the phone calculating her next move.

‘What time will you be back?’ Her voice is softer now, weaker, showing her disappointment in me for being smart with her. I can’t let that happen again. Amber needs to know how much she means to me, that I’ll always be there for her. Especially now with all that’s happening.

‘I’ll be home as soon as possible, Amber, hopefully an hour or two.’

The coffee shop is busy when I step inside. Which is good, it means I’ll have to share a table and might get to talk to someone. Taking my place in the queue I notice the man in front of me being very friendly to the young woman behind the counter. He knows her name and she knows his, which means he must be a regular. With my eyes ignoring the rows of delicious cakes and treats behind the glass barrier in front of me, I eventually arrive at the order station.

‘One skinny latte,’ I say to the girl who immediately goes to the barista machine and begins to prepare it. The man has paid at the till and is taking a seat on a table close by the wall. There’s an empty chair facing him, I’ll head for that.

With the cup rattling on the saucer, I make my way to the chair but just as I’m about to reach it, a young girl rushes in from the door and plonks herself down. ‘Thanks, Dad,’ she says, picking up the mug of coffee.

‘There’s a chair free here,’ a voice says when I’m left standing looking around for somewhere to sit. Turning to find the face behind the voice I see an older woman, late sixties, I’d guess, pointing at a chair opposite hers.

‘Thanks,’ I say, sitting down in front of her. ‘It’s very busy today, isn’t it?’