Thankfully the second security person was a woman around the same age as myself, with an understanding of the days that feel like your train is pulling away from the station just as you arrive on the platform. She hurried proceedings along, releasing me with a wink and a caution. My nerves are shattered. I could not imagine going home and saying I’d been arrested for shop lifting. It was bad enough having one criminal in the house. I lift the kids out of the trolley and leave the shop. A quick lap of Lidl, and I have everything I need to paddle through the next few days. My anxiety levels are on a high. It was Charlie. I know it but why didn’t she stop? Why did she run away from me? That’s very strange. Well, she’s gone now and so are my plans for ever shopping in that branch of Tesco again.

The boys are perched in front of the TV, eating chopped banana, when the phone rings. Shit – Ellen. I forgot to ring her. I’m in no mood now to go through her son’s encounter with the law, so I let it ring out, then send her a text saying I’m busy. That I’ll ring her when I can speak. It’s not really a lie. I am busy. Busy screwing the top off a bottle of merlot.

Amber will arrive home from school just after four so I’ve made sure to brush my teeth three times since having the glass of wine. If she found out I was drinking during the day, I’d never hear the end of it. She’s worse than Tom when making a point. Amber quotes statistics.

I needn’t have bothered. Dropping her bag in the hallway, she shouts out that she’s home then heads straight to her room. I’m beginning to worry that her distancing herself from me so much in the past few months has become a bit more than just a teenage thing. I have enough on my plate but I’d better keep my eye on her. Check her room from time to time, try to get my hands on her phone.

With the boys still navigating the world of animation and Amber pretending to do homework upstairs, I finally ring Ellen and fill her in on what her son was up to yesterday. She doesn’t say much about it, just listens and asks are we all okay.

I get off the phone, prepare the dinner and wait for Tom. Big Bad Tom. He’ll probably come through the door all cheery and smiley. Joking with the kids and making out we haven’t got a problem in the world.

It’s six o’clock when the key turns in the door. Wrong again, Sal?

Chapter Twelve