It's been two weeks since Judge uttered his confession so callously and opened my eyes to the truth. I was foolish before. Naïve enough to believe we could have something. Stupid enough to believe I actually meant something to him. I clung to that desperate want in a hopeless situation. But I'm not the same woman now that I was then.

I'm completely and utterly broken. Empty. Emotionally bankrupt. Yet I'm wiser for the pain. Because I know now that Judge was right about one thing. You can't trust anyone. Especially him.

Tarring him with the same brush as the rest of The Society men would be too gracious. He's worse. His lies have shattered every ounce of trust I had in him. His betrayal and complete rejection of me have made me feel worthless, but that's what they want, isn't it? That's how these powerful men keep women in the tidy little cages they have designed for us.

Don't be too outspoken. Don't think for yourself. Don't dare have a sexual appetite before you're married. And if you do any of those things, then be prepared to face a reality you never wanted to see. You're disposable. If you break the mold, if you step outside of your tidy little cage, you'll no longer be granted a sugar-coated existence. It doesn’t matter what your status is. It doesn’t make a goddamned difference what your last name might be. If you break their rules, they’ll find a way to break you.

I see it now. I can't unsee it. This is what my life will be like in The Society, no matter who I marry. Love and loyalty are the bullshit they spoon-feed us to keep us tame, but every woman knows there's no such thing. Men will be men, and women are expected to turn a blind eye. This is the false sense of security Society daughters cling to in their marriages. They busy their days with activities designed to make them feel as if they’re important. As if they matter. All the while, their men disappear and only come home to sleep in their beds at night or grace them with the occasional appearance at an event.

I'm never going to be able to do that. I'll never feel okay with drowning in silence while my husband inevitably disgraces me behind my back at every opportunity. This might be the life I was born into, but it isn't the life I signed up for. And right now, more than anything, I want out.

Yet I know Judge will never let me go freely. This choice is not mine to make. He's imprisoned me in my room, not even allowing me out to clean the stables. Once a day, Lois comes to get me for lunch, but that's the extent of my freedom. I eat the rest of my meals alone. I sleep alone. I stare out the window... alone.