Josie was choreographing, trying out different combinations and scribbling in a notebook lying open on her bed. The movements surprised me. I’d assumed they’d be like her. Tough and bold and uncompromising. There were elements of that, but there was also one part where she turned her palms to the ceiling and raised her arms, a radiant smile on her face. And then the next second, she made fists and tucked her arms in while rounding her back and scowling. The contrast was so sudden I almost gasped.

That was what she meant when she explained Strange Harmonies to me. Contrasts and oppositions in the world. Joy and anger. Love and hate. Beauty and ugliness.

Eventually, I backed up a few steps and cleared my throat. The music cut off, and Josie’s face appeared at the crack in the door.

I held up the hot chocolate. “From Mom.”

Josie took it, blinking at me like she expected something else. Like an apology for missing her solo. When I didn’t say anything, she shut the door. The music started up again, filling the hallway.

When I closed the door to my room and sat back down on my bed, it was strangely silent, like I was more shut off from the rest of the world than usual. For the first time, it didn’t feel like a relief.

I stood up and spread the purple yoga mat out beside my bed, put the Broadway songbook on top of my bookshelf, and carefully situated the Winter Formal picture on my nightstand, my fingers lingering on the silver frame.

I stepped back to survey my work. They were small changes, but they made my room look different. Like someone actually lived in it again.

January

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

IN FIVE MINUTES, the first Vamp rehearsal would start.

Sitting in the auditorium, I watched Mrs. Sorenson noodle around on the piano, and Ms. Langford mark choreography onstage. Jude wasn’t here yet. At first, I assumed I was nervous because I’d be learning my big dance number—the role I’d been chosen for. But the more I kept glancing at the doors, waiting for Jude to walk in, the more I had to admit it: I was nervous about him.

Over the rest of break, I’d looked at that picture from Winter Formal every night before falling asleep. It made me want to do stupid things. Like bust into Jude’s house in the middle of the night so we could talk in the quiet, like we had outside the gym. Since he was in Indiana, my home invasion plans stayed safely imaginary.