I leave the car parked in a street near Mon Repos and walk across a short road bridge. Down below are the cobbled streets and red rooftops of Lausanne’s city centre, and beyond, far down the hill, Lake Geneva and the mountains the other side, hazy in the afternoon heat. The cathedral’s up a hill to my right, but I resist taking myself on a sightseeing tour. I have a purpose and I need to stick to it. So instead I search the map on my phone and follow the directions down some stone steps into a vast square with a bizarre mix of grandiose buildings and ugly concrete apartment blocks. I wonder if Mum walked here, if she saw this, if that restaurant was here when she was. I wish with all my heart I could ask her.

I find the university library inside the most imposing building in the square. There are a couple of desks with staff serving customers, and beyond that rows and rows of bookshelves. It’s quiet, of course, apart from the turning of pages and the low words of the librarians. I hesitate in the foyer, then hear Maggie’s voice in my head. It’s destroying you. Go and find out what you need to know.

I take a breath and walk over to the desk. ‘Est-ce que vous pouvez…’ I start to say to the young woman sitting behind it, the words I looked up in the dictionary yesterday.

She looks at me, cocks her head. ‘Perhaps I can help you in English,’ she says with the merest hint of an accent. A smile flutters about her mouth.

‘Thanks. I’m looking for a book on feminism in Switzerland during the 1970s. Do you have anything?’

‘Do you know a title or author?’

‘No, I don’t know of a specific book. I’m just looking to research the topic,’ I say.

‘We have a large local history section, with some texts that may cover the subject,’ she says. She comes out from behind the desk. ‘Let me show you.’

I follow her to a sweep of shelves towards the back. I can’t remember the last time I went to a library and the thought makes me sad. I remember going with Mum to Greenwich Library as a child, choosing five books a time and wanting many more.

‘Here. But they are mostly in French or German,’ she says.