I thought of parking my car in its usual place, of walking up the driveway and letting myself into the house. I could do that. My house keys were in my bag, still there from the night I’d left. I could walk in and put my bag on the hall table and go into the kitchen and look at the list on the fridge door and see what was for dinner. I could be back in my kitchen with the radio playing, cooking dinner with a glass of wine by my side. I winced. I used to need that glass of wine. Would I still need it, if I went back?

I don’t know why, but I’d assumed Tom would be at home for the evening. His car wasn’t there, though, and the house was in darkness. I wondered where he was. Was he on a date? If I stayed there long enough, would he come home with a woman, holding her hand and warning her about the uneven steps in the garden? Would he light the candles in the hearth and pour her a gin and tonic and ask her about herself, just as he’d done with me in the early days? And if I went in there, if I went into my kitchen and made it mine again, would he be glad or sorry when he saw me?

My head was aching and I didn’t know what I felt about him now. I was such a bad judge of character. I’d thought Tom was the man for me but I felt like I was stifled and struggling to breathe. Then I thought Harry could help heal me. His relaxed attitude, his affection, and the way he’d treated me as someone precious had drawn me in, but I’d meant nothing to him.

Now I was free, I didn’t know who I was or what I was worth.

•   •   •

I sat there for ten minutes looking at the side of my house, then started the car and drove round the corner so that I was next to the driveway. If Tom drove past me on his way home I’d just have to deal with it. The For Sale sign was placed just where the road turned. That made sense, so that people driving down each road would see it. I knew Tom would have been out there on the lawn, moving it from where the estate agent had placed it to somewhere he deemed right. He had to be right. Even if he moved it only a matter of inches, he’d feel a sense of pride that now it was done properly.