At work the next day, I surprise myself with my own efficiency. My thoughts feel clearer, and my concentration is so much better than it has been these last few days. A sense of clarity is coming back.

At lunchtime, I tell Emma I’m heading out. ‘Do you want me to get you anything from the shops?’

Emma looks up from the desk, her face bright. ‘Um …’ she says. ‘Would it be all right if you got me a KitKat?’

‘Of course.’

She goes digging in her purse for some money and I stand there awkwardly. I want to tell her not to bother about money, but then I worry she’ll feel she owes me and try to return the favour some time, and that just doesn’t feel right. She hands over a two-pound coin. ‘That’ll be plenty, right?’

‘Oh,’ I say, ‘more than enough.’

Once I get outside, I head into the Sainsbury’s right next to the Tube station. Along with the KitKat, I buy myself a sandwich. For the first time this week, I actually have some appetite. I still only have those two items though, so I go to the self-scan checkout and bip them through with my contactless card. Now you can shop for most things without having to talk to anyone at all. Just a computer voice to tell you what to do and, Thank you for shopping at Sainsbury’s. I add a plastic bag in too, even though it costs 5p. It just doesn’t feel right to put Emma’s KitKat straight into my coat pocket, where it might melt or get crushed.

It is a little warmer today, and I think maybe it would be nice to sit outside, in the sun. I’ve got my coat on, enough to keep warm. I head to the open area outside the Ritzy Cinema. They have all these seats here, scattered in little groups. A way of encouraging community, people coming together to talk. It’s nice. Quite a few are empty, so I sit down on one while I eat my sandwich.

When I’m done eating, I pull out my phone and check in case Marianne has messaged. I check my email and Facebook too, even though there’s nothing.

Then I just sit for a while, enjoying the sunshine. I know I can do with the Vitamin D and I can feel my muscles easing, the blood flow opening up. It makes me realize how tense I’ve been lately. I close my eyes against the sun’s rays. I can hear the buses and the car horns and the traffic lights. But today they don’t bother me. Today it’s okay.