‘He was always so full of life and fun, you know,’ I tell my friends with a smile, trying to recall some of Matthew’s real character before the accident. ‘You should have seen him on stage back then when Déjà Vu were on the way to the top! He had crowds of people eating out of his hands, a real showman people couldn’t get enough of. It’s all he ever wanted to do with his life, and we were all right behind him. I still can’t believe it was all taken from him so cruelly.’

I always get such a buzz when I think of Matthew in his heyday, but my lip trembles at the thought of how he is now.

‘You must have been so proud of him,’ Sophie says, softly. ‘You still are proud of him, I know that. What on earth happened for it all to go so wrong for him? Didn’t I hear they had a record deal and were going places?’

I try to speak, but I can’t even go there. I can’t tell any of them how my love for another man, the same man my brother loved, the very man who is the singer in the band they were all just so excited about, is what made Matthew spin his car into a ditch … It’s all too much. I can’t tell them.

‘Just creative differences, I suppose,’ I say with a shrug, hoping that they won’t probe me any further. ‘Matthew always described it as a break-up, and he never got over it so it’s not something he likes to go into much detail on.’

Jack knows I struggle with talking about Matthew, even though he’s never been told the full story. He can tell when I’m struggling, be it a conversation about work, friendship or even something that might come between us. He says he can tell by the quiver in my voice, how I play with my hair or my eyes dart around the room. He knows I’m struggling now.

‘Matthew’s a strong, decent, super-talented guy and he has a great future,’ says Jack, his upbeat tone changing the mood instantly, in a way that only he can. ‘So, Charlotte love, what do you say we get this party started and you give us a song? Find that voice again, I know you can.’

I want to. I really, really want to, but I just can’t. I can’t sing for them. Not now. Not yet.

‘I will someday, love, I promise, but would you mind if we put on the iPod instead?’ I ask, my eyes pleading for understanding. ‘I don’t think Sophie and Harry have heard the sound system yet? It’s awesome.’