I didn’t have to let him do shit. But as I stared into his blue eyes, ones that hadn’t changed a bit, I found that I was still a sucker for his pain. Would do whatever I could to ease it. Even if that made me stupid. Even if it meant that I’d be hurting even more in three months’ time. I swallowed that ball of emotion again. “I can’t give you what we had before—” My voice hitched. “It’s too hard, and I…I’m not the same person I used to be.”

“Neither am I, Bell. It would be impossible for us to be those people.”

“All I can give you is a fresh start. We can get to know each other as the people we are now.” My gaze hardened. “I don’t want to dig up the past, Ford. It’s a no-go zone. You go there, and we’re done.” It was too hard. I couldn’t go there with him when all I’d wanted for so many years was his comfort and support. To talk about Violet with the one person who’d loved her as much as I did, but who also understood us both better than anyone.

Ford gave my hand one more squeeze and then released me. Suddenly, there was air back in my lungs, as if I could finally take a breath after holding it for far too long. Still, I missed the touch just the same. “I can do that, Bell.” He eased back against his chair. “Hunter and Caelyn said you’re taking interior design classes.”

“Those two are worse gossips than the Anchor knitting circle.”

Ford chuckled. “Those ladies still at it?”

I grinned. “Worse than ever.”

“So, you thinking of starting your own business?”

I rolled my lips together and looked down at my hands. “I’m not sure. I love reinventing a space, bringing old pieces of furniture back to life. I’ve done a few projects here and there for friends…the bar is the biggest by far, though.”

What I didn’t say was that the bar was meant to be my business card. Something that could show what I was capable of. But my daydreams of restoring furniture and spaces as a career had gone by the wayside when I stepped in to make sure The Catch stayed afloat.

“You did a great job.”

I arched a brow at Ford. “Really? Mister fancy city, who probably pays someone hundreds of thousands of dollars to decorate his clubs, thinks my two-thousand-dollar reno of The Catch is great?”

Ford shook his head but did it while grinning. “I should’ve known you’d never let me live down creating swanky bars for a living.”