Kenna took a step closer to Caelyn and me, her face grave. “Just be careful. I know he’s been good to you lately, but I just don’t trust that he’s going to stick around.”

I swallowed hard. Ford had made me no promises about the future. Hell, he hadn’t made me any promises about tomorrow. But I didn’t want to lose this shot at even just a moment of happiness because I was too caught up in what might happen weeks or months from now. I was done playing it safe. I didn’t want to miss out on all life had to offer because I was scared of getting hurt. But if I genuinely wanted to live my life to the fullest, I had to let myself love the person my heart wanted above all others. Even if it was the scariest jump I’d ever make.

My fingers drummed in a staccato beat along my thighs, and my stomach seemed to pitch with each turn Ford’s SUV made on the climb back to his house. I really hoped I wasn’t going to have to ask him to pull over so that I could puke on the side of the road.

“You’re quiet.”

I swallowed back the nerves climbing up my throat. “Just tired, I guess.” I was the opposite of tired. My anxiety seemed to be doubling by the second. I’d have to run around the island three times to be able to sleep tonight.

I felt Ford’s gaze on me for a split second. “If you’re so tired, then why does it seem like you’re about to crawl out of your skin?”

I pressed my lips together in a firm line. He knew me too damn well. Even after over a decade apart, he still remembered all my tells. I said nothing, just let the silence in the vehicle dial my anxiety up another degree. I wasn’t going to hold myself back from Ford any longer. I wasn’t going to try and convince myself that friendship or a slow build into something more would ever be enough for me. I was going to let myself love him and not allow myself to drown in fear or guilt because of it.

Just as the thought traveled through my brain, an image of Violet flashed in my mind. I pushed it out. I couldn’t think about her right now. But what kind of sister did that make me?

Ford pulled to a stop in front of his house, turning off the car. I moved on autopilot, unbuckling my seat belt and grabbing the small duffle bag at my feet. I followed Ford into the house, my insides seeming to twist themselves further into a knot with each step.

I stopped in the living room, looking out at the dark sea below. Where was I supposed to go next?