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Back Rabbit Hole Save as PDF
Chapters (73)
  1. Rabbit Hole
  2. Also by Mark Billingham
  3. Title Page
  4. Copyright
  5. Dedication
  6. Epigraph
  7. Preface
  8. PART ONE
  9. ONE
  10. TWO
  11. THREE
  12. FOUR
  13. FIVE
  14. SIX
  15. SEVEN
  16. EIGHT
  17. NINE
  18. TEN
  19. ELEVEN
  20. TWELVE
  21. THIRTEEN
  22. FOURTEEN
  23. FIFTEEN
  24. SIXTEEN
  25. SEVENTEEN
  26. EIGHTEEN
  27. NINETEEN
  28. TWENTY
  29. TWENTY-ONE
  30. TWENTY-TWO
  31. TWENTY-THREE
  32. TWENTY-FOUR
  33. TWENTY-FIVE
  34. TWENTY-SIX
  35. TWENTY-SEVEN
  36. TWENTY-EIGHT
  37. TWENTY-NINE
  38. THIRTY
  39. THIRTY-ONE
  40. THIRTY-TWO
  41. THIRTY-THREE
  42. PART TWO
  43. THIRTY-FOUR
  44. THIRTY-FIVE
  45. THIRTY-SIX
  46. THIRTY-SEVEN
  47. THIRTY-EIGHT
  48. THIRTY-NINE
  49. FORTY
  50. FORTY-ONE
  51. FORTY-TWO
  52. FORTY-THREE
  53. FORTY-FOUR
  54. FORTY-FIVE
  55. FORTY-SIX
  56. FORTY-SEVEN
  57. FORTY-EIGHT
  58. FORTY-NINE
  59. FIFTY
  60. FIFTY-ONE
  61. FIFTY-TWO
  62. FIFTY-THREE
  63. FIFTY-FOUR
  64. FIFTY-FIVE
  65. FIFTY-SIX
  66. FIFTY-SEVEN
  67. FIFTY-EIGHT
  68. PART THREE
  69. FIFTY-NINE
  70. SIXTY
  71. EPILOGUE
  72. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
  73. Back Cover

‘Yeah, that’s fair enough, I suppose.’

‘Sorry, Al. Yeah, sounds a bit stupid when you put it like that.’

‘Right. I mean, you’re the one who understands all this stuff, being a copper and everything . . .’

There are more nods and a couple of them ask me what I think will happen now. I tell them that no two cases are ever the same, then talk them through the basic stages of the process, from arrest to prosecution. I talk and it’s the best I’ve felt in a while, because everyone in that room is hanging on every bloody word . . .

It would be lovely if that was what had actually happened after I’d made my big speech about responsibility. It would have been the high point of a very strange day, but life isn’t like that, is it? Not on Fleet Ward, anyway.

Instead, there’s some cat-calling and a stifled giggle. One of them asks me who the fuck I think I am and someone else tells me to piss off.

They don’t even know about who killed Kevin yet – well, the patients certainly don’t – and I’m sure that when they do, when they find out how wrong I was, I’ll be in for some serious stick.

I can live with that.

I’ve grown used to being doubted and threatened and scared.

Being laughed at feels like nothing any more.

I’m aware of movement in the corridor outside and someone stands up to announce that the police are leaving. That’s the cue for the rest of us to jump to our feet and crowd into the doorway. Nobody says anything, but we crane our heads, elbow and jostle to get a better view.

I briefly catch the detective’s eye as he and the uniforms guide their suspect, none too gently, towards the airlock.

We stand and watch as Lauren is led away in handcuffs.

PART THREE

PART THREE

HEADS OR TAILS

FIFTY-NINE

FIFTY-NINE

Ilias just called to say Lucy’s going to meet us in the pub and he’ll be round to pick me up in ten minutes. I told him that was fine. The truth is, though, I’m actually in a bit of a state, because I don’t want to keep him waiting, but I’m not ready and I still can’t decide which top to wear.

I stand in front of the mirror and hold the two tops I’m trying to choose between up against myself.

Black or red, black or red, black or red?

Why is this so difficult?