I closed my eyes. Yes. “It’s just not the right time.” It will be the end of us. She’ll find someone else. She’ll leave me. I reopened my eyes to see Matt glaring at me, unconvinced by my statement. “Okay…yeah. It’s partly because of Kiera. She and I…we went through so much to get where we are…And we’re finally in a good place, and I can’t…I can’t leave her right now. I’m sorry, but my answer is no. I’m staying here.”

Griffin instantly exploded. “Oh, come on, Kellan! Fuck!”

I lifted a hand to him, trying to squelch his anger, but it didn’t appear to help. “Griff, I’m not saying we’ll never go on tour, I’m just saying not right now.” Shaking his head, still pissed, he crossed his arms over his chest and glared at me like I was personally tearing his dream into tiny pieces. And in a way, I was.

Matt hung his head, looking utterly defeated. “I can’t believe our chance to make it big is finally here…and you’re saying no.”

Guilt flooded me. The guys had sacrificed so much for me—given up their entire life in L.A. to follow me to Seattle, and right when we’d been on the brink. They’d never once asked to go back, never once pushed me to leave here. But there was no way I could say yes to this. I’d lose her. But if I said no…I might lose them. Fuck. “Guys, please…”

Evan clapped me on the shoulder, like he understood my torment. Leaning in, he said, “We’re all leaving people behind, Kellan. We know it’s hard, but this…this could be important for our future. For us and for them. Why don’t you talk to Kiera before you decide anything? She might be more okay with it than you think.”

He extended his hand to point at Kiera, and my eyes followed the gesture. Kiera was pale as she stood there frozen, watching us. She was obviously curious about why we were arguing, but she was nervous too. As she should be. How could she possibly be okay with me leaving for six months? She’d fallen apart when Denny had left for two months. Fallen apart and fallen into my arms. Whose arms would she seek if I left her?