My head told me repeatedly that I didn’t need to know anything about this woman – that I shouldn’t want to know anything about her. But my heart … Well, that was a different matter. David and Anna admitted that my mother was young when she gave birth to me, but they knew far more about her than just that. They knew her name, for starters, so at any given time, I could simply have typed it into Google – although I am still yet to do so. They also knew that she lived in New Zealand – another fact that would have set me on my way towards finding her. David has assured me that the reason they never told me any details was because Bonnie had made them promise they would not – but I’m not so sure that’s the whole story. I know how much I meant to the two of them – especially Anna – and it’s not that much of a stretch to imagine that the desire to keep Bonnie and me apart could have come from her. But even if that was the case, it doesn’t explain why Bonnie herself didn’t come to find me. Why has it been left up to me to do the chasing?

What would Anna say if she could see me now, here in New Zealand, hunting for the woman whose daughter she had raised as her own? Would she understand my reasons for needing to do so, or condemn me for them? David has encouraged me to be here, it’s true, but ultimately, the decision was mine and mine alone. I wanted to come; I can’t deny that.

Deciding to try my best to push these thoughts to the back of my mind, I concentrate on getting ready for my second full day in New Zealand. I start by applying copious layers of high-factor sun cream, then laboriously twist my hair into a low bun and reach for my straw trilby. Despite covering up carefully yesterday, I still managed to burn both my nose and the tips of my ears – the heat here is like nothing I have ever experienced before. I feel like a jacket potato in a microwave.

I left my number with Kit, who promised to drop me a covert text if Bonnie turns up sooner than expected, so my plan for today is a simple one: locate a bench in the shade of a tree and read the novel I bought back at Heathrow Airport. I am determined to do something that takes my mind off Bonnie, off Anna, off everything that is causing my emotions to flounder, and getting lost amidst the pages of a good book feels like my best bet. There is a lot more of Queenstown I have yet to explore, but I figure that can wait another day or so. After all, it doesn’t look as if I’m going anywhere anytime soon.