What am I thinking, rushing in like this without a proper plan? This woman might well be my mother, but that doesn’t mean she won’t turf me out. The last time she saw me I was little more than a few hours old, according to David, and even if she does believe me when I tell her who I am, she may still want nothing to do with me. She has stayed away for all this time, and while things may have changed drastically in my life, her own might be nice and settled just the way it is, without my interruption.

Then again, I counter stubbornly, what does it really matter what she wants? The baby she chose to leave behind is a grown woman now – and that woman needs answers. Hell, I deserve answers. That is what I’ll do – I will ask politely for a private word, then I’ll tell her who I am and ask her what happened, why she gave me away, and who my real father is. I have to believe that the sooner I have these fundamental questions answered, the sooner I can begin to fill that empty space inside myself.

Almost as soon as I convince myself, however, I am assailed by thoughts of Anna, of what she would think if she could see me now. Am I being disloyal to her memory simply by being here? But even if I am, is that enough of a reason to turn and run? I can’t do that now, not after coming all this way. I have to see this thing through, even if it does feel like a betrayal.

‘Not far now,’ the driver says cheerfully, half an hour later, his eyes flicking to the rear-view mirror as I fidget and fret in my seat. I hear loose stones crunching under the wheels and, looking out of the window, I’m thrown by the sight of horses grazing in a wide, wood-fenced meadow. It’s been ages now since I have been this close to them, so I suppose I should have been prepared to feel a wobble.

We pull up at the end of a gated driveway, and the driver turns to face me, an apologetic expression on his face.

‘I can’t take the car along there,’ he explains. ‘Are you cool to walk the last part?’

‘Yes, sure. Of course,’ I say quickly, fumbling in my bag for my purse.

It’s only as I watch him edge away in a cloud of dust that I realise my error. I’m on the edge of a dirt track, seemingly in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by fields, trees and mountains, and I have just let my only means of getting back to Queenstown drive off and leave me here.