“So … centuries of my family standing at the head of the country, only for the history books to forever note it ended with me?” I say. “It’s out of the question. I would step aside before I allowed that to happen. My uncle or cousin could take my place.”

“Okay, so, again … why wouldn’t you do that?”

“Because it’s what I’ve been raised for. It’s the future I’ve always seen for myself. I have things I want to do when I’m queen. With that position, I could do some good. I could make my family proud.”

I might even, one day, become someone I’m proud of myself.

“Why should I give that up?” I finish.

“Because you’re talking about hiding who you are for the rest of your life so you can rule a country you think wouldn’t want you as you are. Where do your needs come into things?”

“They don’t,” I say dryly. “It’s famously part of the job description. Besides, it’s not as though I have to give up on love altogether. I just have to be discreet.”

“And what does that look like, exactly? Weekend booty calls? Or will your side piece live in the palace with you?”

I told Danni she could ask questions, I know, but I don’t have an answer to this one yet. I run my tongue over my teeth. “I think,” I say evenly, “that’s a conversation I would have with whomever I’m committed to at the time.”

Now it’s Danni’s turn to look ashamed of herself. I didn’t mean for her to be. She’s just trying to understand what this all means. What, exactly, a future with me would look like.

It’s not a nice feeling, though, considering all the ways in which I will fail the girl I love one day. How much worse her life will be for loving me rather than anybody else.

“Rose…” Danni says heavily. “I’m new here. I know some things, but I don’t know everything. So I need you to be honest with me. I know Henland’s Catholic. But I’ve seen attitudes change in religious areas before, even in my lifetime. Don’t you think there’s any chance that they might accept a queen who’s with a woman? Even if it’s not today. Maybe ten years from now?”

From her tone, it’s clear she is all but pleading with me to agree with her. She wants me to give her something to cling to—even if it’s only a shred of hope.

But she asked me to be honest.

“I don’t think so,” I say.